As all of the Rivites know, we've been talking about sex at church. Seriously, if you don't go to Riverview, go listen to the podcasts. It has been awesome....and eye opening...and healing...
This past weekend Noel spoke to husbands and wives about their sex lives. He quoted from two books Joey and I have read. Can't remember what those two books are right now, though!
To the Wives:
1. Husbands need to be wanted and desired (they're insecure)
2. Choose to love him in the way he needs (have the conversation on what he needs)
3. Make Sex a priority
4. If you need help get it
To the Husbands:
1. Think clearly about sex
2. Understand how women think
3. It's not about YOU
4. Love your wife like Jesus loved the Church
5. Warm her up with foreplay (this isn't laying in bed and saying "hey, baby." Foreplay starts when sex ends and continues until the sex starts again).
6. Help around the house. Clean the house. This frees her mind to want to do it and you might get some.
7. Dont take "not tonight" personal.
As Noel discussed this, Joey leaned over to me and said, "if that's true...about the husband helping out around the house...you won't have to lift a finger when we get married."
I almost laughed out loud.
I did laugh out loud when Noel told us to bow our heads in prayer and then "Let's Get It On" started playing.
I love my church!
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Know the jury is here
It's true that when I got my jury summons, I groaned. Don't we all. I even called and rescheduled it because the day fell on our company's Christmas lunch. And when my rescheduled day rolled around, I was super swamped at work. Crap.
I showed up today at the 52nd district court and felt a little put out. Just a little. Not a lot. We waited for half an hour before the clerk came in and gave us the run down. Then, we watched a crappy video and waited some more.
A judge came in and thanked us for showing up. He then went on to tell us some of the most amazing stories.
First, he talked about how most jurors just don't show at all. A few years ago, he had to hear 4 cases, 3 of them were child cases. Cases dealing with children are really sensitive. The judge speaks to the child in his chambers without his robe on to get the child comfortable. Then, he puts the robe on. They move the child into the court room, usually with the child's advocate there. They have to warm the child up and make them feel safe. All of this was done and the judge went through the stack of jurors. Only 11 had shown up.
The cases that day could not be heard because the there weren't enough jurors. The cases couldn't go to trial and three possible predators were back on the street.
This same judge went to study the judicial system in Russia. For 10 million people, there are two judges representing everyone. 10 million. 2 judges. There is no time for a formal hearing. The people come in and....they pay. The judges in Moscow asked our judge how much he charges for a rape or a drug charge. Charge? They don't have a jury. The people there don't get a choice if they want their peers to decide the outcome for them. If you have money, you aren't guilty. So who is in the prisons? The people who can't afford to pay: the poor and the mentally unstable. This judge asked to see the prison and found a third group in there: the political dissidents.
Be thankful for the jury or at least for the option. This judge said he resents it when his friends ask him what they have to do to get out of jury duty. Think of all the armed services people who have given up 2-3 years of their lives to serve us. 2 days. For most of us we serve 2 days.
Most times, people choose to have their trial heard by a jury instead of a judge or settling. But then the day comes and if there are people sitting in the jury room waiting to go, things change. Most times, they change their minds. They know the jury is here.
I didn't end up serving on a jury. I guess the people who wanted us so bad decided on their other options. Still, I think I'll look at jury duty a lot differently. Oh, and I got $12 from the county!
I showed up today at the 52nd district court and felt a little put out. Just a little. Not a lot. We waited for half an hour before the clerk came in and gave us the run down. Then, we watched a crappy video and waited some more.
A judge came in and thanked us for showing up. He then went on to tell us some of the most amazing stories.
First, he talked about how most jurors just don't show at all. A few years ago, he had to hear 4 cases, 3 of them were child cases. Cases dealing with children are really sensitive. The judge speaks to the child in his chambers without his robe on to get the child comfortable. Then, he puts the robe on. They move the child into the court room, usually with the child's advocate there. They have to warm the child up and make them feel safe. All of this was done and the judge went through the stack of jurors. Only 11 had shown up.
The cases that day could not be heard because the there weren't enough jurors. The cases couldn't go to trial and three possible predators were back on the street.
This same judge went to study the judicial system in Russia. For 10 million people, there are two judges representing everyone. 10 million. 2 judges. There is no time for a formal hearing. The people come in and....they pay. The judges in Moscow asked our judge how much he charges for a rape or a drug charge. Charge? They don't have a jury. The people there don't get a choice if they want their peers to decide the outcome for them. If you have money, you aren't guilty. So who is in the prisons? The people who can't afford to pay: the poor and the mentally unstable. This judge asked to see the prison and found a third group in there: the political dissidents.
Be thankful for the jury or at least for the option. This judge said he resents it when his friends ask him what they have to do to get out of jury duty. Think of all the armed services people who have given up 2-3 years of their lives to serve us. 2 days. For most of us we serve 2 days.
Most times, people choose to have their trial heard by a jury instead of a judge or settling. But then the day comes and if there are people sitting in the jury room waiting to go, things change. Most times, they change their minds. They know the jury is here.
I didn't end up serving on a jury. I guess the people who wanted us so bad decided on their other options. Still, I think I'll look at jury duty a lot differently. Oh, and I got $12 from the county!
Monday, January 07, 2008
New Year, Same Crap
I had a thought the other morning while in the shower.
People don't have to stop. They don't need to stop doing drugs, getting drunk, having premarital sex, listening to rap, watching porn, committing adultery, blowing their money on new clothes, etc. etc. They don't need to stop. They only need to bring themselves into a place where they can heal. Don't wait to fix yourself. Don't try to reinvent yourself. Just walk through those doors of that local church and find out for yourself. If we didn't try to fix ourselves, we would find complete peace, healing, People feel like they don't want to give up the things they love in order to become a Christian. The crazy thing is that you gain your life back.
People don't have to stop. They don't need to stop doing drugs, getting drunk, having premarital sex, listening to rap, watching porn, committing adultery, blowing their money on new clothes, etc. etc. They don't need to stop. They only need to bring themselves into a place where they can heal. Don't wait to fix yourself. Don't try to reinvent yourself. Just walk through those doors of that local church and find out for yourself. If we didn't try to fix ourselves, we would find complete peace, healing, People feel like they don't want to give up the things they love in order to become a Christian. The crazy thing is that you gain your life back.
Friday, January 04, 2008
Have You Seen Me?
My company is really an awesome place to work…at least for me. I don’t have any complaints. Well, sometimes I do but overall, I’m blessed to work here. After 5 years, there has been a lot of change but this company has kept me through the good and bad. Even when they probably should have fired me, they haven’t. They have forgiven the mistakes I’ve made and rewarded me plenty. I do like it here.
Last year, my company bought another company which distributes the Shopwise ads to your mailbox every week. These are the pizza coupons, Rite Aid and Value City ads with the missing child picture on the back (Have You Seen Me?). I work on the Valassis insert (FSI-Free Standing Insert) in the Sunday paper. We do not have the missing child on our insert but we do have a Valassis banner on the front page.
This Sunday, we are unveiling two new items in our weekly ad:
1.) The Valassis FSI and Shopwise banners are no more. We are officially introducing Redplum. Go to the website for some sweet deals.
2.) Our Sunday FSI will be running a picture of a missing child on the back page.
I’ve got to tell you how amazing the missing child program has been. Here are a few stories we heard from Vince Giuliano, the man in charge of the program in our company:
1.) This program started after Adam Walsh was abducted. The people at Advo (the company Valassis bought last year) were so moved by his disappearance, they jumped over multiple hurdles to get pictures of kids on the back of the Shopwise weekly ad.
2.) The first girl ever featured on the Shopwise ad was never recovered. Every few years, we run her picture again.
3.) The ads have helped recover 146…make that 147 kids
4.) Most people who ID the kids are kids themselves because they are the ones getting the mail. Also, the kids recognize missing kids in their classroom.
5.) One kid identified himself by a baby picture. He never knew he had been taken.
We have been gearing up for these two huge launches for several months now. A member of the missing child department came to talk to us about the challenges of running a child’s picture on the back of our ad. There are certain ads we can’t run with the missing child’s picture. The size of our ads was also reduced on the back. It has been challenging for us but what this guy said during the meeting made most in the room tear up.
“When we find that first child…and I mean WHEN we find him, we will have a huge party.”
The party meant nothing to me. The part about finding this little boy lifted my heart, gave my efforts here more purpose. People kind of laugh when they find out I print coupons for a living but now it is so much more than that.
In the November 25, 2007 Shopwise inserts, we ran this picture:
I actually kept this ad with me and brought it to work. Was it so I could look for the child? Well, no. It was the Omaha Steaks ad just above the missing child photo. I was thinking about ordering from Omaha Steaks for Christmas. A few weeks later, we received this communication about the boy in the above photo:
A young man in North Carolina is no longer missing and is surely facing an entirely different holiday than the one he imagined just a few days ago. His life was changed when a friend’s father knocked on the door and showed him two photos on the back of a piece of mail. “Is this you, son?” asked his friend’s dad, who happens to also be a police officer on the local force. Also at the door were the teacher from his school who had originally recognized his image in the mail, his principal, and another member of the local police force. He looked at the group and simply said, “Yes, that’s me.” He then added, “I’d like to call my mother now.”
The young man and the toddler on the pictures in the mail were five-year-old Francis Coleman and the image created by forensic artists of how he may look at age 16. Francis, now 18 and no longer known by his given name, had been missing since 1994. The age-progressed image of the teen must have been pretty accurate for his teacher to take it to her principal with the question, “Could this be…?” They agreed that it looked enough like him to call the local authorities who then made contact with the young man himself and the National Center For Missing & Exploited Children.
“A picture in a mailbox, with the technology of an age progression, was able to be placed in the hands of a teacher, who took a moment to look, made a heroic call to the National Center, and ended the nightmare of a searching parent. This amazing recovery of a boy missing for more than 13 years is proof of the power of our program to span the barriers of time and distance.” said Vince Giuliano, SVP Government Relations and founder of the America’s Looking for Its Missing Children® Program.
Francis Coleman is the 147th child to be safely recovered as a direct result of our America’s Looking for Its Missing Children® Program. On behalf of Valassis and our program partners, NCMEC and the USPS, we offer congratulations and thanks to everyone involved in Francis’s safe recovery including Firestone, the sponsor of his age-progressed photo. We would like to offer special thanks to all associates of the Durham printing facility for printing the wrap resulting in this recovery. Last but not least, please join us in special congratulations to all associates of the Atlanta branch, our official branch of recovery.
So, take a look this Sunday at the RedPlum insert and please take a good look at Jonah, too. He might be closer than you think and his family is looking for him.
Last year, my company bought another company which distributes the Shopwise ads to your mailbox every week. These are the pizza coupons, Rite Aid and Value City ads with the missing child picture on the back (Have You Seen Me?). I work on the Valassis insert (FSI-Free Standing Insert) in the Sunday paper. We do not have the missing child on our insert but we do have a Valassis banner on the front page.
This Sunday, we are unveiling two new items in our weekly ad:
1.) The Valassis FSI and Shopwise banners are no more. We are officially introducing Redplum. Go to the website for some sweet deals.
2.) Our Sunday FSI will be running a picture of a missing child on the back page.
I’ve got to tell you how amazing the missing child program has been. Here are a few stories we heard from Vince Giuliano, the man in charge of the program in our company:
1.) This program started after Adam Walsh was abducted. The people at Advo (the company Valassis bought last year) were so moved by his disappearance, they jumped over multiple hurdles to get pictures of kids on the back of the Shopwise weekly ad.
2.) The first girl ever featured on the Shopwise ad was never recovered. Every few years, we run her picture again.
3.) The ads have helped recover 146…make that 147 kids
4.) Most people who ID the kids are kids themselves because they are the ones getting the mail. Also, the kids recognize missing kids in their classroom.
5.) One kid identified himself by a baby picture. He never knew he had been taken.
We have been gearing up for these two huge launches for several months now. A member of the missing child department came to talk to us about the challenges of running a child’s picture on the back of our ad. There are certain ads we can’t run with the missing child’s picture. The size of our ads was also reduced on the back. It has been challenging for us but what this guy said during the meeting made most in the room tear up.
“When we find that first child…and I mean WHEN we find him, we will have a huge party.”
The party meant nothing to me. The part about finding this little boy lifted my heart, gave my efforts here more purpose. People kind of laugh when they find out I print coupons for a living but now it is so much more than that.
In the November 25, 2007 Shopwise inserts, we ran this picture:
I actually kept this ad with me and brought it to work. Was it so I could look for the child? Well, no. It was the Omaha Steaks ad just above the missing child photo. I was thinking about ordering from Omaha Steaks for Christmas. A few weeks later, we received this communication about the boy in the above photo:
A young man in North Carolina is no longer missing and is surely facing an entirely different holiday than the one he imagined just a few days ago. His life was changed when a friend’s father knocked on the door and showed him two photos on the back of a piece of mail. “Is this you, son?” asked his friend’s dad, who happens to also be a police officer on the local force. Also at the door were the teacher from his school who had originally recognized his image in the mail, his principal, and another member of the local police force. He looked at the group and simply said, “Yes, that’s me.” He then added, “I’d like to call my mother now.”
The young man and the toddler on the pictures in the mail were five-year-old Francis Coleman and the image created by forensic artists of how he may look at age 16. Francis, now 18 and no longer known by his given name, had been missing since 1994. The age-progressed image of the teen must have been pretty accurate for his teacher to take it to her principal with the question, “Could this be…?” They agreed that it looked enough like him to call the local authorities who then made contact with the young man himself and the National Center For Missing & Exploited Children.
“A picture in a mailbox, with the technology of an age progression, was able to be placed in the hands of a teacher, who took a moment to look, made a heroic call to the National Center, and ended the nightmare of a searching parent. This amazing recovery of a boy missing for more than 13 years is proof of the power of our program to span the barriers of time and distance.” said Vince Giuliano, SVP Government Relations and founder of the America’s Looking for Its Missing Children® Program.
Francis Coleman is the 147th child to be safely recovered as a direct result of our America’s Looking for Its Missing Children® Program. On behalf of Valassis and our program partners, NCMEC and the USPS, we offer congratulations and thanks to everyone involved in Francis’s safe recovery including Firestone, the sponsor of his age-progressed photo. We would like to offer special thanks to all associates of the Durham printing facility for printing the wrap resulting in this recovery. Last but not least, please join us in special congratulations to all associates of the Atlanta branch, our official branch of recovery.
So, take a look this Sunday at the RedPlum insert and please take a good look at Jonah, too. He might be closer than you think and his family is looking for him.
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Grace Like Rain
"I'm not going to church today. I've been puking all night."
"Okay, Joe. I'll get you some Vernor's before church. Hang tight."
"Hey, Todd."
"Hey, Holly."
"Hey, could you save me a seat at church? Just one seat, though. Joey's sick and I need to get him some Vernor's. I'll be a little late."
"No problem. Just pulling into church now."
"Thanks."
"Here's the Vernor's."
"Moan...."
"I'm trying to be patient, lady, but I'm late for church...please just move into the other lane...thank you! I can see the 55 mph sign just ahead...I'll start accelerating now...I'm making great time! ...uh oh....cop....is....pulling me over...."
"Good morning!."
"Morning."
"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"Yes (smile)."
"Where you going?"
"Church (smile)"
"Really (chuckle)."
"Yes...Riverview."
"Okay, I'll be right back."
TEXT MESSAGE FROM TODD (WHO IS A POLICE OFFICER): Where are u?
TEXT MESSAGE BACK: Got pulled over.
TEXT FROM TODD: Cry
TEXT MESSAGE FROM MEGAN: Where are u? I thought u were coming to church?
TEXT MESSAGE BACK: Talking to a nice police officer.
TEXT FROM MEGAN: I agree with Todd. Cry.
"Oh crap. Here he comes. I wonder how much the ticket is going to cost."
"Here you go (hands back license and registration). Have a nice day."
"Uh...."
"Just slow down."
"Okay (almost crying)."
I so deserved that ticket. I knew it and was ready for it. But I didn't get the ticket. The police officer gave me grace and I thought about Christ. I walked into church 10 minutes late and found my friends. As I stood next to them, I realized we were singing "Grace Like Rain." How perfect.
"Okay, Joe. I'll get you some Vernor's before church. Hang tight."
"Hey, Todd."
"Hey, Holly."
"Hey, could you save me a seat at church? Just one seat, though. Joey's sick and I need to get him some Vernor's. I'll be a little late."
"No problem. Just pulling into church now."
"Thanks."
"Here's the Vernor's."
"Moan...."
"I'm trying to be patient, lady, but I'm late for church...please just move into the other lane...thank you! I can see the 55 mph sign just ahead...I'll start accelerating now...I'm making great time! ...uh oh....cop....is....pulling me over...."
"Good morning!."
"Morning."
"Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"Yes (smile)."
"Where you going?"
"Church (smile)"
"Really (chuckle)."
"Yes...Riverview."
"Okay, I'll be right back."
TEXT MESSAGE FROM TODD (WHO IS A POLICE OFFICER): Where are u?
TEXT MESSAGE BACK: Got pulled over.
TEXT FROM TODD: Cry
TEXT MESSAGE FROM MEGAN: Where are u? I thought u were coming to church?
TEXT MESSAGE BACK: Talking to a nice police officer.
TEXT FROM MEGAN: I agree with Todd. Cry.
"Oh crap. Here he comes. I wonder how much the ticket is going to cost."
"Here you go (hands back license and registration). Have a nice day."
"Uh...."
"Just slow down."
"Okay (almost crying)."
I so deserved that ticket. I knew it and was ready for it. But I didn't get the ticket. The police officer gave me grace and I thought about Christ. I walked into church 10 minutes late and found my friends. As I stood next to them, I realized we were singing "Grace Like Rain." How perfect.
from http://asbojesus.wordpress.com/
One week ago tomorrow, I found out that someone I know committed suicide. He was a relative of one of my friends but I also knew him through the running world. He was a husband. He was a father. He killed himself and not in a pleasant way. I keep thinking about the hole he has left in so many lives. I think about his wife who now has to raise their young children alone. I get angry when I think about how selfish he was to something so horrible. I think about Jimmy and how Jimmy did it right across the street from me.
I've been through this before. Everything feels weird for awhile and then people start to heal. I pray the wife will heal. I pray the children will heal. None of them know Christ so I pray He can help them fill that void. As depressed as I felt on Christmas....I just don't get it. And as angry as I am for this guy's selfish decision, I also feel for his pain.
This, more than anything, seems to be a message from God to me about the people of Lansing. Dan Price wrote about us falling in love with the people of Lansing and caring about their salvation. I was in this guy's world as a fellow runner. I was talking to him little by little at each race. God put it on my heart to reach out to him. Of course, I see all of that in hindsight now. I see where God has placed me in His mission. I see so clearly but another one slipped away. I do not think I could have done anything to change this guy's mind about killing himself. I do not blame myself for any of it because I didn't lay out the salvation plan or something. What his death has done for me is reiterate the message: the people around me are broken hearted, numb, falling apart, tired of this life. God has placed me in a position to reach out. I am not the message, though. I just carry it.
Expectation Victim
This Christmas season was a strange one. I didn't get all happy about it. Joey and I had some great times shopping (he's my favorite shopping buddy) but there was something unfulfilled. I wasn't filled with the Christmas joy on Christmas Eve, either. I listened to Mark talk about expectations and I thought about other people's expectations. I guess mine were simple and they weren't met.
I expected to be happy when I woke up Christmas morning. I wasn't. I expected to be happy when I opened my new Zune. I was. I expected the Corr's to be loving and warm to me. They were. I expected members (or member) of my family to be just as warm and loving to my fiance. They weren't. It deflated the rest of my expectations. But there was still a glimmer of hope. I still had my dad's house to go to....and that expectation was thrown out the window when he called to say my step-mom was sick. F-ing expectations.
Joey suggested we go see a movie. We did. Guess what? It didn't really meet my expectations! So maybe I'm setting the bar too high, right? Like I expect too much, ya know. Like it is too much to ask to have people treat you the same every time they see you instead of deciding on some whim they are angry with you. Is it too much to ask for some consistency? Just a little bit?
This entry doesn't have a happy ending. Well, in a way it does. I had a little break down on Christmas night. I just felt unhappy and blah. So, I cried. And Joey was there...like I expected. And as soon as the tears were gone, I felt so much better...except for the sinus pressure which warned me of an oncoming cold. You've got to be kidding!!!!!
I expected to be happy when I woke up Christmas morning. I wasn't. I expected to be happy when I opened my new Zune. I was. I expected the Corr's to be loving and warm to me. They were. I expected members (or member) of my family to be just as warm and loving to my fiance. They weren't. It deflated the rest of my expectations. But there was still a glimmer of hope. I still had my dad's house to go to....and that expectation was thrown out the window when he called to say my step-mom was sick. F-ing expectations.
Joey suggested we go see a movie. We did. Guess what? It didn't really meet my expectations! So maybe I'm setting the bar too high, right? Like I expect too much, ya know. Like it is too much to ask to have people treat you the same every time they see you instead of deciding on some whim they are angry with you. Is it too much to ask for some consistency? Just a little bit?
This entry doesn't have a happy ending. Well, in a way it does. I had a little break down on Christmas night. I just felt unhappy and blah. So, I cried. And Joey was there...like I expected. And as soon as the tears were gone, I felt so much better...except for the sinus pressure which warned me of an oncoming cold. You've got to be kidding!!!!!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
God and Movies
A month or so ago, Jun, Joey and I watched Evan Almighty (little sidenote here....on Sunday, Joey and Junior helped me out in my first grade RivKid class. Little Emmy pointed at Jun and whispered "he looks like Evan Almighty." I laughed so hard...because he does!). Morgan Freeman had such an awesome line in the movie I meant to look up and quote. Then, Noel played the clip a few weeks ago. Here it is:
God (Morgan Freeman): Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Then, a few weeks ago, Jun, Joey and I (wow, this is a common statement) watched Amazing Grace. Two lines from that movie were pretty awesome, too.
John Newton: God sometimes does His work with gentle drizzle, not storms. Drip. Drip. Drip.
John Newton: Although my memory's fading, I remember two things very clearly. I'm a great sinner and Christ is a great Savior.
I love those lines.
God (Morgan Freeman): Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Then, a few weeks ago, Jun, Joey and I (wow, this is a common statement) watched Amazing Grace. Two lines from that movie were pretty awesome, too.
John Newton: God sometimes does His work with gentle drizzle, not storms. Drip. Drip. Drip.
John Newton: Although my memory's fading, I remember two things very clearly. I'm a great sinner and Christ is a great Savior.
I love those lines.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Venting
I just thought I would warn you...
I am a bride. I am not and have not been behaving like a bridezilla even when things have not been going my way. I have shed some tears. I have felt I've been treated unfairly. I have moved on and have had amazing support. Thank you for the support.
I need support.
Please, please, please....do not remind me I'm getting married in six months. I already know and it's funny when people act like I don't know it. I do. Lay off. We'll get everything done.
YES! I KNOW I'M GETTING MARRIED IN SIX MONTHS AND STILL DON'T HAVE A WEDDING DRESS. PLEASE BACK OFF AND I MEAN THAT IN THE NICEST WAY EVEN THOUGH I'M WRITING IN CAPS.
Thank you for reading. I will return to my nice, agreeable self now.
Cheers!
I am a bride. I am not and have not been behaving like a bridezilla even when things have not been going my way. I have shed some tears. I have felt I've been treated unfairly. I have moved on and have had amazing support. Thank you for the support.
I need support.
Please, please, please....do not remind me I'm getting married in six months. I already know and it's funny when people act like I don't know it. I do. Lay off. We'll get everything done.
YES! I KNOW I'M GETTING MARRIED IN SIX MONTHS AND STILL DON'T HAVE A WEDDING DRESS. PLEASE BACK OFF AND I MEAN THAT IN THE NICEST WAY EVEN THOUGH I'M WRITING IN CAPS.
Thank you for reading. I will return to my nice, agreeable self now.
Cheers!
New and Old
New members of the family:
My cousin (the one in the middle) became a grandfather on Friday (that's crazy!) to Savannah Jayde. His son, the one on the right, is married to Katie, the one with the baby. Her brother is Eric Salisbury at Riverview. Can't wait to meet Savannah. She's like my third cousin or something.
My cousin Travis with his niece.
My cousin Sarah with her niece and....her fiance! Jeremy asked Sarah to marry him yesterday and she accepted. After she said yes, Jeremy asked her the most amazing question: will you pray with me. That part of the story made me cry because these two are so in love with Jesus and want Him to be in every part of their relationship.
Another new member! Mia Phoebe! She is Joey's first cousin. Aunt Robyn had little Mia on November 7. Kind of funny how my family is having third cousins and Joey's still getting first cousins.
With all of these new changes, I was stuck today with a sudden yearning for my grandparents. I had breakfast with my co-workers at the college cafe this morning. One of the dishes was oatmeal and it tasted exactly like the kind my grandma Louise used to make. I longed for her so badly my heart hurt. Later, we could hear some old time Christmas music and again, I missed the people who have passed away and I longed for the past. Funny how that works sometimes.
My cousin (the one in the middle) became a grandfather on Friday (that's crazy!) to Savannah Jayde. His son, the one on the right, is married to Katie, the one with the baby. Her brother is Eric Salisbury at Riverview. Can't wait to meet Savannah. She's like my third cousin or something. 
My cousin Travis with his niece.
My cousin Sarah with her niece and....her fiance! Jeremy asked Sarah to marry him yesterday and she accepted. After she said yes, Jeremy asked her the most amazing question: will you pray with me. That part of the story made me cry because these two are so in love with Jesus and want Him to be in every part of their relationship. Another new member! Mia Phoebe! She is Joey's first cousin. Aunt Robyn had little Mia on November 7. Kind of funny how my family is having third cousins and Joey's still getting first cousins.
With all of these new changes, I was stuck today with a sudden yearning for my grandparents. I had breakfast with my co-workers at the college cafe this morning. One of the dishes was oatmeal and it tasted exactly like the kind my grandma Louise used to make. I longed for her so badly my heart hurt. Later, we could hear some old time Christmas music and again, I missed the people who have passed away and I longed for the past. Funny how that works sometimes.
Thanksgiving 2007
Thanksgiving was held at Joey's house this year. My step-mom (the one in the green apron) suggested she make the turkey and we provide the house. I have to say, it worked out well, even if there were one or two people dearly missed. 
I love this picture of Joey's parents, my step-mom, nephew, Gram and sister at the Thanksgiving dinner table.
I love this picture, too of my parents talking and my niece. She leaned in and looked interested because she saw me taking the photo. What an actress.
My mother
My father and I
My nephew and his can of Cranberry. Joey planning out our Black Friday trip.
Putting up our sorry Christmas Tree.Yes, I do know where my Bible is, Noel...
So, the other day, I walked into my bathroom and this image struck me as so funny, I had to take a picture. In case you can't tell, that black book underneath the roll is my Bible. 
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Happy Thanksgiving!
Sandy (my co-worker): I drove by the turkey farm on 5 mile this morning.
Me: Yeah....
Sandy: There weren't any turkeys outside.
Mourn for them today....eat 'em tomorrow. Yum!
Me: Yeah....
Sandy: There weren't any turkeys outside.
Mourn for them today....eat 'em tomorrow. Yum!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Hiding
I remember when I was stuck in a sin pattern in my life. I avoided my Christian friends like crazy and leaned more on the people who wouldn’t tell me the truth…calling my sin a sin. Both groups of friends loved me but I knew the pre-Christians would allow me to hide. And that is what I would do….hide.
I was ashamed. I was hurting myself. I was making myself sick. The secret inside of me was literally causing me to die spiritually every day. Physically, it was killing me, too because I couldn’t sleep or eat.
I have a friend who is addicted to drugs. When I don’t hear from her, I know she’s doing them or she’s doing stuff she doesn’t want me to know about. She hides from me. She hides from everyone. I haven’t heard from her since September. I know things must be bad. Really bad.
I have other friends, too, who hide stuff from me because they don’t want me to know. What does that say about me? Are they expecting a lecture? Are they expecting a judgment call?
Noel’s teaching this weekend really blew me away. A lot of it I was taught in Route 66 but the fresh new way Noel presented the story was amazing.
We have all been hiding since the garden.
God gave Adam and Eve one boundary. Just ONE boundary.
Genesis 2:15 And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."
Temptation is a daily thing for me. Whether I’m tempted to lie my way out of a situation, gossip about someone, buy something I shouldn’t, choose to be angry about something I can’t control…I know I’m tempted. We all have those weaknesses.
Eve was tempted by the serpent to be like God.
Genesis 3:1 He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?"
We all know the right course of action. Even Eve knew it.
Genesis 3:2 The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, 3 but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.' "
I had learned in Route 66 about this response Eve gave. She added to the boundary. God never said she couldn’t touch the fruit. Maybe she thought if she touched it, she would want to eat it. Kind of like people addicted to internet porn who know that even having a computer in the house is too much of a temptation. But maybe not because Eve didn’t even know what sin was. She just wanted to please the Lord.
Eve listened as the serpent lied to her, convincing her to eat the fruit. Apparently, she not only had never touched fruit from this tree but she had never even looked at the tree before. Genesis 3:6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.
Then, her husband ate some.
They felt shame immediately and what did they do?
Genesis 3:8 “…they hid from the LORD God…”
Things haven't changed much, have they?
And what did God do? He looked for them, called out to them.
Genesis 3:9 But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"
God knew where they were but He wanted Adam and Eve to come forward, admit their sin, stand ready for the consequence and then continue to be loved by Him. Before He gave the woman her eternal punishment, He offered her redemption. I love this!
Genesis 3: 15
And I will put enmity
between you [the serpent] and the woman,
and between your offspring [a] and hers;
he will crush [b] your head,
and you will strike his heel."
Serpent’s offspring? Satan (the serpent was Satan)
Eve’s offspring? Jesus.
The Lord still wasn’t finished. Eve and Adam ate from trees. They did not animals. There was no death before sin, either. Everyone was happy, innocent and sin-free. But when these two sinned and felt shame in their nakedness, the Lord killed an animal to make clothes for them. As Noel said, “this is one of the biggest forshadowings of all time.”
Blood was shed to cover their sin. This, again, points to Jesus. I love it.
I remember when I came out of hiding from my sin. I confessed it to three Christians and there was pain in my words. There was some pain in their responses. But the pain wasn’t exactly their disappointment in me. The pain came from my pain. I hurt = they hurt. Every single one of these people prayed with me over the phone. Every one of them encouraged me to stop the sin but were grateful for my admission. Every one of them gave me hope. The weight was gone. I could eat again. I felt free again. I could sing again.
My friend Marlene always used to say, “secrets don’t make friends.” No, they don’t. Some secrets can destroy. And I just wonder how people get through this life without Christ. God clothed Adam and Eve with animal skins. God clothed us with Christ. Are you out in this world with a secret sin? Are you shivering, cold, alone? Turn away from that sin and clothe yourself with Christ.
I like this cartoon from Noel’s website. It really does reflect what our reaction should be when someone admits sin to us. I’ve learned though personal experience but I need to be reminded every day.
I was ashamed. I was hurting myself. I was making myself sick. The secret inside of me was literally causing me to die spiritually every day. Physically, it was killing me, too because I couldn’t sleep or eat.
I have a friend who is addicted to drugs. When I don’t hear from her, I know she’s doing them or she’s doing stuff she doesn’t want me to know about. She hides from me. She hides from everyone. I haven’t heard from her since September. I know things must be bad. Really bad.
I have other friends, too, who hide stuff from me because they don’t want me to know. What does that say about me? Are they expecting a lecture? Are they expecting a judgment call?
Noel’s teaching this weekend really blew me away. A lot of it I was taught in Route 66 but the fresh new way Noel presented the story was amazing.
We have all been hiding since the garden.
God gave Adam and Eve one boundary. Just ONE boundary.
Genesis 2:15 And the LORD God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."
Temptation is a daily thing for me. Whether I’m tempted to lie my way out of a situation, gossip about someone, buy something I shouldn’t, choose to be angry about something I can’t control…I know I’m tempted. We all have those weaknesses.
Eve was tempted by the serpent to be like God.
Genesis 3:1 He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?"
We all know the right course of action. Even Eve knew it.
Genesis 3:2 The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, 3 but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.' "
I had learned in Route 66 about this response Eve gave. She added to the boundary. God never said she couldn’t touch the fruit. Maybe she thought if she touched it, she would want to eat it. Kind of like people addicted to internet porn who know that even having a computer in the house is too much of a temptation. But maybe not because Eve didn’t even know what sin was. She just wanted to please the Lord.
Eve listened as the serpent lied to her, convincing her to eat the fruit. Apparently, she not only had never touched fruit from this tree but she had never even looked at the tree before. Genesis 3:6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.
Then, her husband ate some.
They felt shame immediately and what did they do?
Genesis 3:8 “…they hid from the LORD God…”
Things haven't changed much, have they?
And what did God do? He looked for them, called out to them.
Genesis 3:9 But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"
God knew where they were but He wanted Adam and Eve to come forward, admit their sin, stand ready for the consequence and then continue to be loved by Him. Before He gave the woman her eternal punishment, He offered her redemption. I love this!
Genesis 3: 15
And I will put enmity
between you [the serpent] and the woman,
and between your offspring [a] and hers;
he will crush [b] your head,
and you will strike his heel."
Serpent’s offspring? Satan (the serpent was Satan)
Eve’s offspring? Jesus.
The Lord still wasn’t finished. Eve and Adam ate from trees. They did not animals. There was no death before sin, either. Everyone was happy, innocent and sin-free. But when these two sinned and felt shame in their nakedness, the Lord killed an animal to make clothes for them. As Noel said, “this is one of the biggest forshadowings of all time.”
Blood was shed to cover their sin. This, again, points to Jesus. I love it.
I remember when I came out of hiding from my sin. I confessed it to three Christians and there was pain in my words. There was some pain in their responses. But the pain wasn’t exactly their disappointment in me. The pain came from my pain. I hurt = they hurt. Every single one of these people prayed with me over the phone. Every one of them encouraged me to stop the sin but were grateful for my admission. Every one of them gave me hope. The weight was gone. I could eat again. I felt free again. I could sing again.
My friend Marlene always used to say, “secrets don’t make friends.” No, they don’t. Some secrets can destroy. And I just wonder how people get through this life without Christ. God clothed Adam and Eve with animal skins. God clothed us with Christ. Are you out in this world with a secret sin? Are you shivering, cold, alone? Turn away from that sin and clothe yourself with Christ.
I like this cartoon from Noel’s website. It really does reflect what our reaction should be when someone admits sin to us. I’ve learned though personal experience but I need to be reminded every day.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Girl on the Run
My niece, Lyndsay, joined an after school program called Girls on the Run. A little bit about this program from their website:
Girls on the Run is a non-profit prevention program that encourages preteen girls to develop self-respect and healthy lifestyles through running. Our curricula address all aspects of girls' development - their physical, emotional, mental, social and spiritual well-being.
Girls on the Run International (GOTRI) is the parent organization of more than 120 Girls on the Run councils across the United States and Canada. GOTRI establishes, trains and supports a network of community-level councils with local volunteers. The volunteers serve as role models to the girls through coaching the 12-week, 24 lesson curricula. The curriculum is delivered in these areas through after-school programs, recreation centers and other non-profit settings.
Girls on the Run International (GOTRI) is the parent organization of more than 120 Girls on the Run councils across the United States and Canada. GOTRI establishes, trains and supports a network of community-level councils with local volunteers. The volunteers serve as role models to the girls through coaching the 12-week, 24 lesson curricula. The curriculum is delivered in these areas through after-school programs, recreation centers and other non-profit settings.
Lyndsay's 5K completed the 10 week program. Last Saturday was the 5K.
First, Lynds came to my mom’s house and asked me to teach her how to do the runner’s knot. I’ll admit, I got a little choked up. Then, we picked up Joey and headed out to Hawk Island. There were so many little girls! Some of my friends were coaches for other teams so while I chatted, Joey registered Lyndsay. Her bib number, along with everyone else’s bib #, was the number 1. 
We found her team, Ruth (my running nemesis) and I teased each other and then the girls warmed up, stretched. I told Lyndsay to pray and ask God to help her if she needed to get through the run. I assured her that He would either give her the strength to get through the 3.1 miles or give her a pretty bird to look at while she walked. They were dismissed to the start line by school and were reminded that every runner had to be done before they could have their snack at the end. With that, they were off!
Joey and I started by standing in front of the start line but after Lynds passed, we moved to the front of the finish line.
The girls had to run around Hawk Island twice. When the runners started coming around for their first loop, Joey and I were yelling hard, giving them encouragement and reminding them they were half way done. Lynds was toward the end of the middle bunch of girls. She was walking when we first saw her but started running again when she saw us. 10 minutes after she passed, we were still cheering girls on when the pace bike came into view. We were all a little confused. The dude on the bike yelled, “this is the first runner, everyone!” We erupted in cheers. Some of those girls are fast runners! From that point on, we would just give are all to these girls, telling them to run it in and sprint. I actually got a little out of control, yelling “run, run, go!” Almost every single girl would either pick it up or start running again. The best was when I saw Lyndsay. She was walking and started running when she saw us (she lamp posted the whole race). But after she passed us, she started walking again. I had turned my attention to the next set of girls until I heard Joey say, “Holl, she’s walking!” Well, I couldn’t have that! I broke one of the rules and started running after her on the pavement. “Run, Lyndsay! Run, run, run!” She started running and finished the race. Proud moment. But I wonder if I’m going to be one of those parents.
All of the girls finished…except one. The announcement came that the last runner was about 10 minutes out and then everyone could have their snack. Joey and I knew which runner it was. She was a heavier set girl who probably walked most or all of the course. I went back to stand with Joey and everyone waited. Suddenly, one by one, all of these little girls started running back to the last runner. They were her teammates and they were going to finish with her. Then, girls who didn’t even know her started running back there. Joey and I seriously got chills and a little teary when the group came into sight.
They were chanting “Samantha, Samantha.” And then, this little girl started jogging…just a little bit…and she finished.
It was such an awesome experience and we had a lot of fun cheering the girls on. I have a goal to be a coach of a Girls on the Run team sometime in the future. I really want to help out.
Lyndsay’s already talking about her next 5K. Not sure when that will be, though!
We found her team, Ruth (my running nemesis) and I teased each other and then the girls warmed up, stretched. I told Lyndsay to pray and ask God to help her if she needed to get through the run. I assured her that He would either give her the strength to get through the 3.1 miles or give her a pretty bird to look at while she walked. They were dismissed to the start line by school and were reminded that every runner had to be done before they could have their snack at the end. With that, they were off!Joey and I started by standing in front of the start line but after Lynds passed, we moved to the front of the finish line.
The girls had to run around Hawk Island twice. When the runners started coming around for their first loop, Joey and I were yelling hard, giving them encouragement and reminding them they were half way done. Lynds was toward the end of the middle bunch of girls. She was walking when we first saw her but started running again when she saw us. 10 minutes after she passed, we were still cheering girls on when the pace bike came into view. We were all a little confused. The dude on the bike yelled, “this is the first runner, everyone!” We erupted in cheers. Some of those girls are fast runners! From that point on, we would just give are all to these girls, telling them to run it in and sprint. I actually got a little out of control, yelling “run, run, go!” Almost every single girl would either pick it up or start running again. The best was when I saw Lyndsay. She was walking and started running when she saw us (she lamp posted the whole race). But after she passed us, she started walking again. I had turned my attention to the next set of girls until I heard Joey say, “Holl, she’s walking!” Well, I couldn’t have that! I broke one of the rules and started running after her on the pavement. “Run, Lyndsay! Run, run, run!” She started running and finished the race. Proud moment. But I wonder if I’m going to be one of those parents.All of the girls finished…except one. The announcement came that the last runner was about 10 minutes out and then everyone could have their snack. Joey and I knew which runner it was. She was a heavier set girl who probably walked most or all of the course. I went back to stand with Joey and everyone waited. Suddenly, one by one, all of these little girls started running back to the last runner. They were her teammates and they were going to finish with her. Then, girls who didn’t even know her started running back there. Joey and I seriously got chills and a little teary when the group came into sight.
They were chanting “Samantha, Samantha.” And then, this little girl started jogging…just a little bit…and she finished.It was such an awesome experience and we had a lot of fun cheering the girls on. I have a goal to be a coach of a Girls on the Run team sometime in the future. I really want to help out.
Lyndsay’s already talking about her next 5K. Not sure when that will be, though!
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Thursday, November 15, 2007
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
One of my very favorites...
Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.
Be Thou my Wisdom, Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee, Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.
Be Thou my battle-shield, sword for my fight,
Be Thou my dignity, Thou my delight.
Thou my soul's shelter, Thou my high tower.
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise,
Thou mine inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of heaven, my Treasure Thou art.
High King of heaven, my victory won,
May I reach heaven's joys, O bright heav'ns Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my vision, O ruler of all.
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.
Be Thou my Wisdom, Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee, Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.
Be Thou my battle-shield, sword for my fight,
Be Thou my dignity, Thou my delight.
Thou my soul's shelter, Thou my high tower.
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise,
Thou mine inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of heaven, my Treasure Thou art.
High King of heaven, my victory won,
May I reach heaven's joys, O bright heav'ns Son!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my vision, O ruler of all.
Friday, November 02, 2007
Submission...or whatever you don't want to call it
What a fun topic, huh? But lately, it’s been coming up over and over and over. I can’t believe I’m on the side which is defending submission. I can’t believe there’s a pastor sitting on the other side.
I’m defending submission because it is in the bible. He is against submission because…he…doesn’t like it? I’m not even sure where he is coming from. He just keeps saying he doesn’t like it.
But…God said…well, what did God say?
Romans 13:1[ Submission to the Authorities ] Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Romans 13:5Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience.
Ephesians 5
21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."[c] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
And now…the definition:
sub·mit Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[suh b-mit] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation verb, -mit·ted, -mit·ting.
–verb (used with object)
1. to give over or yield to the power or authority of another (often used reflexively).
2. to subject to some kind of treatment or influence.
3. to present for the approval, consideration, or decision of another or others: to submit a plan; to submit an application.
4. to state or urge with deference; suggest or propose (usually fol. by a clause): I submit that full proof should be required.
–verb (used without object)
5. to yield oneself to the power or authority of another: to submit to a conqueror.
6. to allow oneself to be subjected to some kind of treatment: to submit to chemotherapy.
7. to defer to another's judgment, opinion, decision, etc.: I submit to your judgment.
Does it state that the one doing the submitting is weaker? Less than? A piece of poo? A slave? Beneath? Inferior? Maybe one of the definitions leaned that way but I have a feeling that is what our socieity has done to the word.
After all, do you feel that way when you stop at a light? Or when you pay for something at the mall? Honor the home of a friend by not smoking, drinking, swearing, etc.? We submit all the time. The Lord asks us to.
I did some research and I feel like I’m defending God because I went to the Bible first. Myself and Riverview are not making this stuff up! I’m getting a little fired up and really, I shouldn’t. The Lord is in control, not me, not the other pastor. And I’m learning through this whole experience. So, I’m sharing some schtuff, mainly so I have a place to keep my thoughts.
I go this from Bible.com:
What is the definition of submission? It is yielding to another's desires without resistance. Submission to another's wishes is an attitude of the heart done willingly, while surrender is yielding by being forced to do so.
Soooo…..
Submission = willingly
Surrender = forced
And who do we all submit to first?
God.
SUBMIT TO GOD FIRST…ALWAYS
”Therefore SUBMIT TO GOD [and not to the devil], [but] RESIST THE DEVIL ...[and] DRAW NEAR TO GOD...” (James 4:7,8).
Women and men. Husbands and wives. We submit to God first and foremost.
From an article I found on Divorce Hope.com
http://www.divorcehope.com/christiangodlysubmissioninmarriage.htm
“The subordinate submission Scriptures tells wives to submit to their OWN husbands: “Wives, SUBMIT to your own husbands, AS TO THE LORD” (Ephesians 5:22). Notice that wives are not to submit to “another man”, but the man of the marriage. More importantly, the submission to the man of the marriage is “AS TO THE LORD.” What does “as to the Lord” mean? And to whom is submission rendered? “As to the Lord” is the way a Christian ought to submit to others. Whether it is our spouses, our employer, or those who are in law enforcement or government authorities, the submission that we render to them is the same submission that we would render to the Lord Jesus Himself — “as [we would submit] to the Lord.” Meaning, God commands us to resist evil no matter what form it comes in and no matter who it comes through.
“We have been taught that we are to blindly follow our spouse, but that is just not true. God set up specific guidelines in His written Word for us so we will not be deceived and do wrong. Gods’ written Word is our foundation. His Holy Spirit will lead and guide us according to that Word. The Lord Himself would not have anyone do anything ungodly (evil) or under coercion or manipulation. In a marriage, submitting “as to the Lord” is submitting to that which is OF THE LORD in your spouse.
“For instance, let’s say that an angel spoke to us to do something evil, we would have NO choice but to resist and say, “No!” The Word of God, which is our instructions on how to submit, says to “Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. Resist the devil ...[and] draw near to God...” (Romans 12:9, James 4:7, 8), NO MATTER WHO IT IS! Even if it’s “...an angel from heaven ...let him be accursed” (Galatians 1:8). The Scripture says to “cling to what is good” (Romans 12:9c).
“CLINGING IS SUBMITTING! WHEN IT’S “OF THE LORD”, YOU SUBMIT “AS TO THE LORD.” WHEN IT’S NOT “OF THE LORD”, YOU DON’T SUBMIT “AS TO THE LORD.” For example, you are not to submit to abuse; it’s not “of the Lord.””
So, I am to submit to God first. This means that if my husband leads me away from God, wants me to something illegal or not biblical, I am to say no.
My first allegiance is to God. I belong to Him.
I also belong to my husband….and he belongs to me, too. That doesn’t sound like tyranny and chauvinism, does it?
Back to Divorce Hope.com:
“Submission to our spouse is never greater than our submission to God. Some people actually think God gives us the liberty to have another god before us. That is just not so (See Exodus 20:3). We must always submit to God first. He knows what decisions to make. As we submit to God and to one another He uses these situations to mature us, to bless us, and to reveal our own weaknesses. This results in our seeking Him all the more. “For when I am weak, THEN I am strong” (2Corinthians 12:10b).“There are all kinds of daily situations where one must submit to another. Husbands and wives need to make decisions daily about certain things. These decisions are not always to separate the good from the evil, but deciding what’s the best thing to do in a particular situation.
“For example, we may need a car, but what kind? How much do we spend? These kinds of situations are where we grow together as husband and wife while submitting to one another. We must gain understanding of what kind of car fits our needs so we can make a wise decision. At times it is not always clear which course of action to take. This is where praying together in agreement comes in — seeking Gods heart together. Even though a better automobile may be needed, which one is the right one for us?
Hold on….what do you think of this part:
“Suppose the wife felt in her heart that God said, “THIS car is the one”. But the husband isn’t sure which car to get. What could happen next? The husband could override his wife and say no, or the husband could trust the Lord through his wife and submit to her after they talked it out, even as Abraham submitted to his wife, Sarah (See Genesis 21:12). In these kinds of daily decisions, IT’S BETTER FOR THE HUSBAND AND WIFE TO BE IN AGREEMENT AND SUBMIT TO EACH OTHER EVEN IF IT’S THE WRONG CHOICE. The choice could be wrong because of a lack of knowledge. It is better to submit to each other, instead of not being in agreement, which causes strife. It is God’s heart to make right a wrong situation when the couple is in agreement seeking Him even if they did make the wrong choice. It is God’s heart to make right a wrong situation when the couple is in agreement seeking Him even if they did make the wrong choice. It is better to be in agreement and make a wrong choice with a clean conscience than for one spouse to disagree and make the “right” choice and be in constant strife. “For where envy and self-seeking [strife] exist, CONFUSION AND EVERY EVIL THING ARE THERE” (James 3:16).
From Bible.com
In the Spirit, women are equal with men, and each must submit unto Jesus as their spiritual head.
In the flesh, in the marriage relationship, women are to be subject to their husband's headship.
The Lord ordained that the man be the one that would make final decisions in the home because in any relationship involving two people one must be the final authority. Men are to love their wives like Jesus loves the church. He laid His life down for her. Men that are demanding that their wives submit to them have not learned the right way to win them and that is to love them with the love of the Lord.
From this definition we see we are to yield to one another instead of demanding our own way.
"Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another" (Romans 12:10).
Both husband and wife should be submissive and loving. The love of Christ should be the rule in the home. When wifely submission is over-stressed we find it can lead to many problems that cause the husband-wife relationship to be thrown out of balance. Some even stress it to the degree that a wife must obey every command her husband dictates to her. They arrive at this conclusion because of the Scripture, "Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything" (Ephesians 5:24). The word "everything" here is not inclusive of evil things. Women are to submit to their husbands as the church is to submit unto Christ. Christ would never ask anything of the church that was not according to God's Word. Women are never to submit unto things that do not line up with God's Word.
I’m defending submission because it is in the bible. He is against submission because…he…doesn’t like it? I’m not even sure where he is coming from. He just keeps saying he doesn’t like it.
But…God said…well, what did God say?
Romans 13:1[ Submission to the Authorities ] Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.
Romans 13:5Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience.
Ephesians 5
21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."[c] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
And now…the definition:
sub·mit Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[suh b-mit] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation verb, -mit·ted, -mit·ting.
–verb (used with object)
1. to give over or yield to the power or authority of another (often used reflexively).
2. to subject to some kind of treatment or influence.
3. to present for the approval, consideration, or decision of another or others: to submit a plan; to submit an application.
4. to state or urge with deference; suggest or propose (usually fol. by a clause): I submit that full proof should be required.
–verb (used without object)
5. to yield oneself to the power or authority of another: to submit to a conqueror.
6. to allow oneself to be subjected to some kind of treatment: to submit to chemotherapy.
7. to defer to another's judgment, opinion, decision, etc.: I submit to your judgment.
Does it state that the one doing the submitting is weaker? Less than? A piece of poo? A slave? Beneath? Inferior? Maybe one of the definitions leaned that way but I have a feeling that is what our socieity has done to the word.
After all, do you feel that way when you stop at a light? Or when you pay for something at the mall? Honor the home of a friend by not smoking, drinking, swearing, etc.? We submit all the time. The Lord asks us to.
I did some research and I feel like I’m defending God because I went to the Bible first. Myself and Riverview are not making this stuff up! I’m getting a little fired up and really, I shouldn’t. The Lord is in control, not me, not the other pastor. And I’m learning through this whole experience. So, I’m sharing some schtuff, mainly so I have a place to keep my thoughts.
I go this from Bible.com:
What is the definition of submission? It is yielding to another's desires without resistance. Submission to another's wishes is an attitude of the heart done willingly, while surrender is yielding by being forced to do so.
Soooo…..
Submission = willingly
Surrender = forced
And who do we all submit to first?
God.
SUBMIT TO GOD FIRST…ALWAYS
”Therefore SUBMIT TO GOD [and not to the devil], [but] RESIST THE DEVIL ...[and] DRAW NEAR TO GOD...” (James 4:7,8).
Women and men. Husbands and wives. We submit to God first and foremost.
From an article I found on Divorce Hope.com
http://www.divorcehope.com/christiangodlysubmissioninmarriage.htm
“The subordinate submission Scriptures tells wives to submit to their OWN husbands: “Wives, SUBMIT to your own husbands, AS TO THE LORD” (Ephesians 5:22). Notice that wives are not to submit to “another man”, but the man of the marriage. More importantly, the submission to the man of the marriage is “AS TO THE LORD.” What does “as to the Lord” mean? And to whom is submission rendered? “As to the Lord” is the way a Christian ought to submit to others. Whether it is our spouses, our employer, or those who are in law enforcement or government authorities, the submission that we render to them is the same submission that we would render to the Lord Jesus Himself — “as [we would submit] to the Lord.” Meaning, God commands us to resist evil no matter what form it comes in and no matter who it comes through.
“We have been taught that we are to blindly follow our spouse, but that is just not true. God set up specific guidelines in His written Word for us so we will not be deceived and do wrong. Gods’ written Word is our foundation. His Holy Spirit will lead and guide us according to that Word. The Lord Himself would not have anyone do anything ungodly (evil) or under coercion or manipulation. In a marriage, submitting “as to the Lord” is submitting to that which is OF THE LORD in your spouse.
“For instance, let’s say that an angel spoke to us to do something evil, we would have NO choice but to resist and say, “No!” The Word of God, which is our instructions on how to submit, says to “Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. Resist the devil ...[and] draw near to God...” (Romans 12:9, James 4:7, 8), NO MATTER WHO IT IS! Even if it’s “...an angel from heaven ...let him be accursed” (Galatians 1:8). The Scripture says to “cling to what is good” (Romans 12:9c).
“CLINGING IS SUBMITTING! WHEN IT’S “OF THE LORD”, YOU SUBMIT “AS TO THE LORD.” WHEN IT’S NOT “OF THE LORD”, YOU DON’T SUBMIT “AS TO THE LORD.” For example, you are not to submit to abuse; it’s not “of the Lord.””
So, I am to submit to God first. This means that if my husband leads me away from God, wants me to something illegal or not biblical, I am to say no.
My first allegiance is to God. I belong to Him.
I also belong to my husband….and he belongs to me, too. That doesn’t sound like tyranny and chauvinism, does it?
Back to Divorce Hope.com:
“Submission to our spouse is never greater than our submission to God. Some people actually think God gives us the liberty to have another god before us. That is just not so (See Exodus 20:3). We must always submit to God first. He knows what decisions to make. As we submit to God and to one another He uses these situations to mature us, to bless us, and to reveal our own weaknesses. This results in our seeking Him all the more. “For when I am weak, THEN I am strong” (2Corinthians 12:10b).“There are all kinds of daily situations where one must submit to another. Husbands and wives need to make decisions daily about certain things. These decisions are not always to separate the good from the evil, but deciding what’s the best thing to do in a particular situation.
“For example, we may need a car, but what kind? How much do we spend? These kinds of situations are where we grow together as husband and wife while submitting to one another. We must gain understanding of what kind of car fits our needs so we can make a wise decision. At times it is not always clear which course of action to take. This is where praying together in agreement comes in — seeking Gods heart together. Even though a better automobile may be needed, which one is the right one for us?
Hold on….what do you think of this part:
“Suppose the wife felt in her heart that God said, “THIS car is the one”. But the husband isn’t sure which car to get. What could happen next? The husband could override his wife and say no, or the husband could trust the Lord through his wife and submit to her after they talked it out, even as Abraham submitted to his wife, Sarah (See Genesis 21:12). In these kinds of daily decisions, IT’S BETTER FOR THE HUSBAND AND WIFE TO BE IN AGREEMENT AND SUBMIT TO EACH OTHER EVEN IF IT’S THE WRONG CHOICE. The choice could be wrong because of a lack of knowledge. It is better to submit to each other, instead of not being in agreement, which causes strife. It is God’s heart to make right a wrong situation when the couple is in agreement seeking Him even if they did make the wrong choice. It is God’s heart to make right a wrong situation when the couple is in agreement seeking Him even if they did make the wrong choice. It is better to be in agreement and make a wrong choice with a clean conscience than for one spouse to disagree and make the “right” choice and be in constant strife. “For where envy and self-seeking [strife] exist, CONFUSION AND EVERY EVIL THING ARE THERE” (James 3:16).
From Bible.com
In the Spirit, women are equal with men, and each must submit unto Jesus as their spiritual head.
In the flesh, in the marriage relationship, women are to be subject to their husband's headship.
The Lord ordained that the man be the one that would make final decisions in the home because in any relationship involving two people one must be the final authority. Men are to love their wives like Jesus loves the church. He laid His life down for her. Men that are demanding that their wives submit to them have not learned the right way to win them and that is to love them with the love of the Lord.
From this definition we see we are to yield to one another instead of demanding our own way.
"Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another" (Romans 12:10).
Both husband and wife should be submissive and loving. The love of Christ should be the rule in the home. When wifely submission is over-stressed we find it can lead to many problems that cause the husband-wife relationship to be thrown out of balance. Some even stress it to the degree that a wife must obey every command her husband dictates to her. They arrive at this conclusion because of the Scripture, "Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything" (Ephesians 5:24). The word "everything" here is not inclusive of evil things. Women are to submit to their husbands as the church is to submit unto Christ. Christ would never ask anything of the church that was not according to God's Word. Women are never to submit unto things that do not line up with God's Word.
If any man, husband or otherwise, would ask us to do something that Jesus would not sanction, then we must refuse to do it. We should also do and apply those things that the Holy Spirit would speak to us to do. We must obey Him over what man would say to us. If it is truly the Lord speaking to us, He will deal with the one who is wrong.
Here are some bullet points from the rest of the article:
*Most women who have a problem submitting to their husbands have the same problem submitting to the Lord.
*Mary submitted to God regarding her pregnancy without discussing with Joseph first. This is a case where a woman submitted to God first, and then the Lord dealt with her husband showing him she had heard the Lord.
*When the Scripture speaks of wives obeying and submitting to their husbands, it cannot mean that every wife must obey her husband always in everything. She, as well as he, is responsible to obey what the Spirit gives each to do. The husband does not lead the wife into all truth since this is the work of the Holy Spirit.
*This does not license a wife who has a domineering spirit to do anything she wants simply because she says she is only subject to the Lord.
*The Lord is displeased with any person who tries to dominate and rule another's life, whether that person be male or female.
SUBMISSION OUT OF BALANCE
Submission has been out of balance in both directions, thereby causing much confusion in the body of Christ. Those who refuse to submit to any authority are just as out of balance as those who submit to every dictate of those who they feel are their superiors, regardless of the mandates. We must have the leadership of the Holy Spirit in all areas of our lives. Legalistic approaches to the Word of God always bring bondage. Paul's letter to the Galatians was a reprimand to the people who were leaving the simplicity of the gospel and reverting back to strict rules and regulations.
We have the same problem today within the church as some are becoming hard and dogmatic in dealing with the truth and with people. Submission is required of God's people, but never to the point that men begin ruling other men's or women's lives. This has been abused greatly in regard to church authority. Some pastors have become dictators, while others have become so permissive (all in the name of love) that order is lost in the church. With no order in the body of Christ there is chaos. There has to be respect for the pastor and the other offices in the body of Christ. Any legalistic approach to this, however, brings bondage and does not carry out God's wishes. God's true pastors lead His flock in love and by example.
And this whole article from Bible.com was (gasp!) written by a woman: Betty Miller.
RECAP:
1.) Submit to God first and always.
2.) Submit to Husband unless it is contradictory to God.
3.) Submit to each other so there is no strife in the marriage.
4.) Be careful of unbalanced submission.
5.) If I have trouble submitting to a godly husband, than I have trouble submitting to the Lord.
6.) Do not be domineering. Do not allow others to domineer you.
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