Unitarian

I heard about the church shooting this morning and was horrified once again. I was also horrified to find out the "church" was a Unitarian Universalist church. Please don't misunderstand me. The tragedy is horrifc. It makes me shudder to think we aren't safe anywhere. Aside from that, I wanted to know more about Unitarian Universalists. This is what I found on the website:

What do Unitarian Universalists believe?
WE BELIEVE in the freedom of religious expression. All individuals should be encouraged to develop their own personal theologies, and to present openly their religious opinions without fear of censure or reprisal.
WE BELIEVE in the tolerance of religious ideas. All religions, in every age and culture, possess not only intrinsic merit, but also potential value for those who have learned the art of listening.
WE BELIEVE in the authority of reason and conscience. The ultimate arbiter in religion is not a church, nor a document, nor an official, but the personal choice and decision of the individual.
WE BELIEVE in the never-ending search for Truth. If the mind and heart are truly free and open, the revelations that appear to the human spirit are infinitely numerous, eternally fruitful, and wondrously exciting.
WE BELIEVE in the unity of experience. There is no fundamental conflict between faith and knowledge, religion and the world, the sacred and the secular, since they all have their source in the same reality.
WE BELIEVE in the worth and dignity of each human being. All people on earth have an equal claim to life, liberty, and justice-and no idea, ideal, or philosophy is superior to a single human life.
WE BELIEVE in the ethical application of religion. Good works are the natural product of a good faith, the evidence of an inner grace that finds completion in social and community involvement.

Coming off the Mountain Top

When I stepped off the plane, home from my mission trip, I wanted a Vernor's....really bad. I felt sick from the plane ride. Yes, those were my thoughts when we finally touched down in Detroit from Germany. The car ride was surreal after being away for 10 days in a foreign country. I was glad to be back home but my heart was focused on Christ and the time I had spent doing His work. I wanted to go back to Germany and continue to reach people for Christ.

I learned about Mountain Top Experiences in BSF this past year. The term comes from the Bible and here is the mountain Peter was on--

Matthew 17
The Transfiguration
1After six days Jesus took with him Peter, James and John the brother of James, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. 2There he was transfigured before them. His face shone like the sun, and his clothes became as white as the light. 3Just then there appeared before them Moses and Elijah, talking with Jesus.

4Peter said to Jesus, "Lord, it is good for us to be here. If you wish, I will put up three shelters—one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah."

Can you imagine? Put yourself in Peter’s place. You have been listening and following Jesus for awhile now. You have this feeling about him…like Jesus might be the real deal. Still, you don’t fully understand. Then, Jesus takes you to the top of a mountain and changes right before your eyes. Crazy stuff like his face is radiating light and he becomes completely white. And if that isn’t enough to make you crap yourself, Moses and Elijah are suddenly there. But now you are surely crapping yourself because you actually hear the voice of God!

5While he was still speaking, a bright cloud enveloped them, and a voice from the cloud said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!"

Peter didn’t want to leave. He was in the perfect place, hanging with his buddies John and James but also surrounded by Moses, Elijah, Jesus and God. He didn’t want to leave. He wanted to stay there with them in that way forever. He was willing to build them shelters (I smile at Peter’s naive excitement--so much like me).

6When the disciples heard this, they fell facedown to the ground, terrified. 7But Jesus came and touched them. "Get up," he said. "Don't be afraid." 8When they looked up, they saw no one except Jesus.

9As they were coming down the mountain, Jesus instructed them, "Don't tell anyone what you have seen, until the Son of Man has been raised from the dead."

So the answer to Peter’s suggestion of staying on the mountain was no. Peter couldn’t stay there. He followed Jesus back down the mountain and they met a desperate father.

The Healing of a Boy With a Demon

14When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him. 15"Lord, have mercy on my son," he said. "He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water. 16I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him."

17"O unbelieving and perverse generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me." 18Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed from that moment.

19Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, "Why couldn't we drive it out?"
20He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."[a]

I’m not sure why the disciples didn’t believe they could heal the boy but that has nothing to do with this blog entry. Here is my point. The Lord led the group up the mountain. He revealed to them his authority and spiritual realm. He showed them Moses and Elijah…even God showed up. It was a mountain top experience and they wanted to stay there forever. The peace, the miracles, the absolute awesomeness of the entire situation—I would have wanted to stay, too. But no. Jesus brought them back down. And what was the first thing they did when they returned? Served others. Healed a boy.

When I came back from my mission trip, I immediately wanted to go on another one. I wanted to stay in those moments surrounded by the Holy Spirit, feeling Jesus so strongly, walking with Him and being consumed by the need to share Him with others. But I had to come home.

A month after I was home, Dan Price did a teaching on being a missionary. He discussed all the different mission trips Riverview supports and sends people out on. He then said something I needed to hear. He said the same thing Peter needed to hear from Jesus. No matter where you are, you are on mission. At work, at home, at the store, at a football game, at school, at a concert, at the bar, at the park, running a 5K….you are on a mission. Now, this does not mean you outcast yourself by constantly talking about Christ to everyone around you (that doesn’t go over so well). What it does mean is you serve the people in your life or the people you meet for a brief moment. Holding the door for a woman with a stroller, helping out at the Shared Pregnancy Center, listening to a pre-Christian friend cry about her live-in boyfriend…serving others in a million different ways and praying God gives you the opportunity to share Christ with them. Serving along with living your life as an example—on a mission.

A friend of mine went on his first mission trip somewhere in Europe. He was so moved by what he saw and the mountain top experience was so awesome that he wanted to quit his job to go back to the country to serve them. But God doesn’t necessarily want us to quit our jobs and move to where the mountain top experience occurred. He calls some of us to do that but not all of us. He gives us the mountain top experiences so that we can go back down the mountain to serve others. It’s like he fills us up so we have enough spiritual fuel to go on down here in the trenches, where he needs us as well. My friend who was going to give up his job and move to Europe prayed about the decision. He didn’t make a quick move but waited on the Lord. The day he realized God wanted him to stay put was the day he took his future wife on their first date.

God gives us mission trips, Christian conferences, teachings on Saturday night and Sunday mornings, spiritual retreats and so on to charge us but we can’t always stay there. These are magical moments, glimpses inside heaven and they keep us going in order to serve, teach, march forward until the next mountain top experience.

Your Base

So...I had another thought today while talking to my husband. We were talking about active waiting (see below) and then we switched to our friends who always seem to be distracted by the negativity going on their lives. Sounds a lot like me. I mean, I go through it, too where I just don't feel happy. I have a friend, though, who is constantly depressed. He has contemplated suicide because he feels so uncomfortable in his own skin. He doesn't like his past, he doesn't like where he is now, either. It's like he wallows in this self-destructive thinking--all the time--and....he's a Christian. He loves Jesus. He is saved. So....why feel this way?

I have another friend struggling with a broken relationship. He described everything wrong with his life. As he talked, I thought of something Mr. Rogers mom used to tell him. When he was a boy, he would get so traumatized by world events. His mom told him to look for the good in the situation. Look for the miracles. Look for the heroes. Look for God in it.

Today was a crappy day at work. A sales person yelled at me in front of my supervisor. I had a $50 billing error. Someone was questioning another billing spreadsheet. I had programs getting ready to print but I didn't have the materials. I barely got a lunch in. I began to be pulled down and started responding to my circumstances with emotion.

And then...on cubicle wall...I saw the promises of God.

In Christ I have…
An acceptance that can never be questioned. Ephesians 1:6
A nearness to God that can never be reversed. Ephesians 2:13
An inheritance that can never be lost. 1 Peter 1:3-5
A righteousness that can never be tarnished. 2 Corinthians 5:21
A grace that can never be limited. 2 Corinthians 12:9
A salvation that can never be canceled. Hebrews 5:9
A joy that need never be diminished. John 15:11
A peace that can never be disturbed. John 14:27

I can't pick my circumstances but I can choose my response. I need to think before I react, too. I could have been sucked down into the mucky self-pity swamp but I got back to my base.

Wrestlers start on their feet. Eventually one of them is in the down position. As he fights for his life (or to stay off his back), the coaches yell "get back to your base!" The wrestler tries to back to that basic position of being on all fours because from that position it is easier to stand up (and your less likly to go to your back).

Get back to your base. Remember God's promises. Remember what Jesus died for--your sin. When we wallow in it all, we sometimes negate what Christ did on the cross. We need to stop trying to pay for something already purchased.

Lots of things to think about during that two hours a day of driving....

Active Waiting

"So...what do you want me to do? Just sit around and wait while you make up your mind? Do you expect me to just tap my fingers and stare at a blank wall while you make a decision??? Yeah...wait around for you...sure..."

I've said that before. I've heard others in my life say the same thing. Waiting = doing nothing

I was listening to a Christian program on the radio yesterday. They were talking about active waiting. They didn't call it active waiting but that's what it was.

You don't sit around doing nothing. You get on your knees and stay there, praying and asking God for wisdom. You get in the Word and you stay there, seeking the Lord's will.

Waiting = Praying
Waiting = Reading
Waiting = Listening
Waiting = Seeking council

The Peacful Day Before cont.

I pulled my car into the Ponderosa parking lot and stopped alongside the row of trees next to the freeway. I was in a daze as Devon talked. We were both torn between shock, grief, and excitement for Susan. Honestly….and yes, I’m going to divulge this information about myself to be honest…but I honestly had a part of me that thought, “my wedding is ruined.” It was ruined because the sky didn’t seem as blue. Ruined because I didn’t feel smiley anymore. Ruined because my pastors and friends were grief-stricken. Ruined because Noah’s mommy was gone and Joel’s best friend…gone.

As I began pulling up a chair to the pity party in my head, I heard Devon say, “Holly, this should not effect your wedding. Susan’s life is a celebration and your wedding is a celebration as well.” I hung up with Devon and called Jenny. As we discussed what had happened, I felt I needed to see Joey as soon as possible. I called him next. He was confused because we had decided not to have contact with each other until the wedding. Just hearing his voice made me miss him so much more. We hung up as I walked into my mom’s work for my appointment. Words began to slip out of my mouth and it seemed unreal to me. I lay down in the chair to get my eyebrow’s waxed and tears streamed down my face. I’m not sure if my mom thought it was from the waxing or if she knew. She didn’t really say. She just wiped them as they fell.

Now, I was really thinking about Noah, Susan’s two-year-old. I saw them two weeks before then. It was after the 11:30 service and Susan was sitting in the front row of church with Noah. Dan was playing the guitar while Noah clapped his hands. We made some small talk but nothing I can remember. I do remember her face and that she was wearing a brown jacket of some kind. I remember that because of her huge brown eyes. My memory took me back to the days when I first met her…probably in 2004 when she took over Suzanne’s position in RivKids. Susan and I seemed to have a similar sense of humor at times. I remembered when she was pregnant. I remembered when Joel, her husband, joined RivRunners e-mailing list but never showed up to the runs until about two months ago. I remembered Joel and I laughing about it, how he had been one of the first members but it took two more years for his schedule to clear. I also remember when Susan talked about her past to the entire church. I e-mailed her that week to thank her for coming forward but I used the Susan@eriv.net. Again-ha, ha because a different Susan using that e-mail address now, e-mailed me back. I never followed through.

My mom finished my brows and my phone rang. It was Joey. Before I could pick up the phone, I totally lost it. I handed the phone to my mom who explained to Joey that I couldn’t talk—literally. I left the salon and headed toward East Lansing to complete an errand. I called Joey’s mom, Reta, to make sure she brought her grandparents’ place setting for the wedding communion. But again, I could barely speak. “Where are you, honey?” She asked. I looked around me…feeling lost in my own town.

“Riverview,” I managed to say.
“Pull into the parking lot. I’m coming to get you.” So, I did. I grabbed my Bible and sat on the grass sobbing hysterically. Not a soul was near. Just me and God. I cried to Him and read from Matthew. I can’t ever remember what I read now. Reta picked me up but I couldn’t get a grip. Thoughts of Susan, Joel and Noah just kept running through my head. And her friends…who were my friends…and her pastor who is my pastor….the Savior we share…

Reta drove me to Pruess’ Pet store. I wanted to buy Joey a Plecostomus for his fish tank as his had died a few days before. I got overwhelmed and we ended up getting him a gift card. Joey called while we ran our next errand. He told his mom he had looked everywhere for the DVD burner. Now he remembered where it was. Reta turned to me and said, “I have good news…and some bad news. But in light of everything going on, it really isn’t that bad.”
“Okay,” I responded. I had calmed down enough and actually felt peaceful.
“The good news is we know where the DVD burner is but that’s where the bad news starts. It was in the basket of stuff Junior had brought to Charlar Place which must have been pushed under a table.”
“Oh no…”
“And the owner of Charlar Place is up north for the rest of the weekend.”
“Oh…..no…..”
We devised a plan to go to Best Buy and purchase another DVD burner. In the meantime, Peter would bring his Mac over to my mom’s in about an hour to see if we could transfer the files and burn it on Peter’s laptop. But when I looked for my wallet, it wasn’t in my purse. I had figured that out at Pruess’ but now…what was I going to do? Reta didn’t have her debit card or checkbook.
“Let’s go to my parent’s house,” I said.

This is where I will probably get a little mushy. I mean, everything that was happening that day was like one attack after another. I didn’t intend on being a bridezilla but my stress level was out of control. I had cried out to the Lord in the Riverview parking lot. Immediately, He sent help from all sides to calm my fears and be on attack instead of under attack.

Christine immediately gave me the money I needed to purchase the DVD burner. I barely finished my sentence on why I needed the money and it was in my hand. I’m so thankful to her.

My cousin Michael was on the phone helping me pick out a DVD burner compatible with a Mac to make sure I got the right one.

Peter was at my mom’s house when he should have been mountain biking with Joey. As we waited (forever it felt like) for the files to transfer, we had a chance to talk. He told me that Jim Lenon was ready to step in to take Dan’s place on the guitar if needed. Jim had even been practicing that afternoon just in case. Then, Joey called Peter and said that Noel (our pastor) had just called. Noel said they were taking this day to mourn but tonight (for Sean and Mikenna) and tomorrow (me and Joey) would be celebrations. Everything was going to be okay. On top of that, I was surrounded by people who loved and cared for Joey and I. Even when these people were hurting, too, at the same time they were mourning their friend, they would celebrate our marriage. And the friends in our circle…words can’t possibly express enough gratitude and love.

I felt safe and an armor of protection surrounded me.

Peter left with the files and headed to Joey’s. I headed to my mom’s room and took a shower. I decided to text message Suzanne to tell her I was praying for her (Susan and Suzanne were very close). But I had to pass Susan Haist’s name in my cell phone. I didn’t even realize I had her number…but of course I did because of RivKids. I felt exhausted and laid down on my mom’s bed.

I woke up feeling totally alone. I wanted out of that dark room and I wanted my girlfriends. I met Jenny and Yi at Joey’s, burned some music CDs and grabbed the last DVD, completed by Peter. It was done. The last DVD was finally done.

We went to church. It was the 6:30ish service. Randi-Kay was standing near the back. I hugged her tight and we talked about Susan. Randi-Kay imparted so much wisdom on me I was amazed. She’s been a Christian for a year and a half and God is using her. While I talked to RK and to Monaca who had joined us, I realized I could be happy. It wasn’t disrespectful to Susan to be happy about my upcoming wedding day. The shadow I felt had been following me around all day and clouding the most exciting event of my life thus far was NOT Susan. Susan was a light for the world. She was bright and funny and loved the Lord. That cloud around me lifted and I joined my friends in the third row. I sobbed as I sang the songs and smiled at God when James Granger read the verse I had read earlier in the day whiled crying in the Riv parking lot for Susan. Dang….I love God.

After the service, we were allowed to go into the new auditorium and write on the floors before they were carpeted on Tuesday. I picked a spot in the middle and wrote this...

Joseph and Holly Corr 5/25/08 ~Praying for our pre-Christian friends and for those lost (crossed out) Found!

Yi, Jenny and I drove to the Kellogg Center and met up with Becky in the ramp. As we walked to the front desk, I saw my aunt Ginny and her family. I felt so full of love and excitement. They were here for me. Me! ME?!?! I really was getting married in less than 24 hours. Wow.

The girls and I went to dinner at the State Room. We drank wine, ate pasta and laughed. It felt so good to smile and laugh with them. My priorities were totally in check. I had been so nervous the day before and earlier in the morning that my throat felt like it was squeezing shut. That feeling had been replaced with grief, confusion and God forced me to check myself.

Self checked.

I was marrying my best friend in just about 12 hours. And here I was with some of my best friends. We struggled to get the bed out of the couch.....

and I sighed peacefully as Yi and I got into the King bed of the suite. My prayer that night went something like, “Dear Heavenly Father…ummm...I'm getting married tomorrow....”

…and then I was asleep. What a day.