Time:28:58
9:20 Mile
16th out of 91 runners my age
586th overall
Thanks for the prayers on my ankle. By mid-morning on Friday, there was no pain. The tendons were a little stiff but the pain was gone. So again, thank you!
JAC and I drove to Flint Saturday morning. We cut it too close. There were so many people down there that it was hard to find a place to park. By the time we got close to the start line, I had 20 minutes to find the registration and packet pick up. Remind me to never pick up my packet the day of the run! I stopped to ask some dudes where the packet pick up was located. “Inside the hotel.” Well, in order to get to the hotel, I had to cross in front of all the 8kers getting ready for their race. There were so many people.
Joey and I split up with me running ahead to get my packet. Upon entering the hotel lobby, I asked a woman standing in the ballroom door where the registration and packet table was located. “Follow the blue line.” So, I followed this %$@ blue line which zig zagged back and forth through all of these displays. I began to run and finally game to the end. Ahhhhh….packets.
I approached the table and confidently gave my name. “You need to give me your number.” “My number?” “Yes, its located on the wall behind me.” Thousands of names were on this list but I found mine.
Now, last weekend when I ran the Shared Pregnancy Center race, I was number 13. My number for this race was like 3,969 or something. Crazy. So, I booked it out to the front of the hotel and my heart was pounding. There was no Joey and I thought the 5kers were lined up ready to start. I began to panic. I asked a woman how to get the chip on my shoe in order to time me. She didn’t know how. Either did I because Joey usually puts it on my shoe. So, I’m freaking out, losing control and the nicest man approaches me and puts the chip on. The race started. Tears were rolling down my face. “I can’t find my boyfriend. I have to run with my sweatshirt, t-shirt and my packet information.” This nice man took my stuff and told me he would check it in at the hotel under my race number. I wiped my face and headed for the race.
I think it was then that two things happened. The first thing was I realized it was the 8k that had just started, not the 5k. So, I went into the hotel and started to stretch. What else could I do? It was then that Joey found me. He gave me my MP3 player and took my ID and bank card. We split up again with him going to find the stuff I had given a total stranger. I headed for the start line…the 5k start line. The second thing that happened was Yi and her dad were waving to me from the bank. I was so relieved to see them. I briefly spoke to her and then joined the runners. A few minutes before the race began, I ran back over to Yi and asked her to pray. Peace and comfort flooded my body. I was okay. Why had I even questioned God?
The race started but because of all the people, I couldn’t get my usual start. It took awhile, with people weaving in and out, running right in front of me (I almost plowed into someone because of it) but I finally broke through the crowd. The adrenaline was pumping. My spirits were lifted. We headed down Kearsly street and I noticed the 8kers coming the other way. I couldn’t help it. I clapped for them and some of them clapped for us. It was kind of like Merrill on Signs: “It just seemed wrong not to swing.” That is how I am when I’m running. I’m smiling, clapping, waving and feel uplifted.
As I rounded a corner, a specific song came on my MP3 player. The lyrics just blew me away.
If tomorrow is Judgment Day
And I'm standing on the front line, mmm...
And the Lord asks me what I did with my life,I will say,
I spent it with you.
I started to cry. The holy spirit was on me. It was so strong that it just lifted me up, gave me peace, joy and I was spilling over in tears. I passed a church whose members were handing out water. They had a huge quote on a banner which said John 4:14 "but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." I just couldn’t stop smiling and said, “God bless you” as I accepted their glass of water.
It was nearing the end of the race. I had no clue what my time was or how I was doing. Corner after street corner started to grind on my nerves a bit. Where was the finish line already?! But then, I turned my last corner, and there it was. I saw the clock counting down “29:12, 29:13, 29:14….” I hauled it with everything I had in me. The streets were lined with people. They were yelling and cheering us on. I crossed the finish line.
Yi and Joey found me right away. I was elated. I didn’t care I had finished worse than my race the week before. I finished the Crim! I didn’t realize what I big deal it was until my step-mom posted this message on our family website:
Holly is being modest. The Crim is listed in Runners World as one of the best 10 races to do in your lifetime. AND she came in 16th in her age group in a field of 91 runners. Considering she only started seriously training this summer makes that finish "huge" - esp. at her advanced age. Running is as much mental as physical - maybe more. I for one am totally impressed - as is her father. Run Holly Run!!!!!
As it turned out, my time didn’t start until I crossed the start line, not when the gun went off. So, I really ran it in 28:58. Pretty good. Really good. What meant more to me was running with God.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Friday, August 25, 2006
I need prayer
...and I'm not above asking for it.
I hurt my ankle. Not sure how but the tendons or muscles in the back of my ankle...my achilles' tendon, I guess...hurts. No clue how this happened. I was packing last night and do nothing out of the ordinary and whamo. Pain. Lots of pain. Couldn't even walk. So I limped around the condo. I thought it would be better this morning but one step out of bed and it was worse. I used a heating pad (sorry if I offended everyone that's shouting "no! ice it!") and the pain subsided. I'm walking okay now but the tendon feels a little tight. Here is where I need prayer.
Call me stupid but I'm still running the Crim. I have faith God will get me through but I might have to be carried across the finish line. I just want to run this race so bad, I already paid the money and I'm mentally prepared. It's my last race for awhile and was also started the year I was born.
It's going to be fine but if you could say a little prayer, that would rock.
Thank you, sheep.
I hurt my ankle. Not sure how but the tendons or muscles in the back of my ankle...my achilles' tendon, I guess...hurts. No clue how this happened. I was packing last night and do nothing out of the ordinary and whamo. Pain. Lots of pain. Couldn't even walk. So I limped around the condo. I thought it would be better this morning but one step out of bed and it was worse. I used a heating pad (sorry if I offended everyone that's shouting "no! ice it!") and the pain subsided. I'm walking okay now but the tendon feels a little tight. Here is where I need prayer.
Call me stupid but I'm still running the Crim. I have faith God will get me through but I might have to be carried across the finish line. I just want to run this race so bad, I already paid the money and I'm mentally prepared. It's my last race for awhile and was also started the year I was born.
It's going to be fine but if you could say a little prayer, that would rock.
Thank you, sheep.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Facing Pain, Receiving Joy: Part 3
I had to teach RivKids Sunday at 10. I was pumped to teach but I felt weary from being a little sick and from the battle that had raged in my mind. I went to my classroom feeling so comfortable…and…well…I almost have to laugh. I can’t even really write about it but I’ll just say this: you can have many, many “safe places” in your life (places you can hide), but if God wants to make a point, if He wants you to turn around and face something, you can’t run for long. Well, I didn’t have a choice about the situation, but I did have a choice about my reaction. I swallowed my pride, prayed about it and quit running from it. I ended up feeling so much peace. The turmoil inside faded quickly. I had an awesome time teaching my kidlets about what God cares about. I even faced the thing I keep running from, pretty much because God has made it obvious I can’t run anymore. Again, relief and peace.
After picking grass in Riv’s front yard with Yi, talking to both Noel and Steve, missing a chance to say hello to Alan (sorry!) and listening to Eric tell me his gross story about breaking his ankle, I was on my way to Joey’s with a heart overflowing with confidence. People love me. I love them. There’s still a blog coming about that topic, though. Joey and I packed, became hungry, went to Applebee’s, had really bad service, gave our waiter a $5 tip anyhow, saw my step-dad and went back to packing. With Nick’s help we got almost everything out. The kitty cats might need therapy after the car ride, though. I was following Joey in the Mazda and decided to pass him. I saw Chessie sitting in his lap. When I called him, he said Hemi was hiding under the seat but Chessie was trying to co-pilot the Ion.
It was a lot of work to move Corr to the Corr's but I got to help unpack which is my favorite part of moving. I slept in the guest bedroom and felt like I was at a bed and breakfast.
Yes, this weekend was not full of joy but it was certainly a test of character. Will I be moved?
After picking grass in Riv’s front yard with Yi, talking to both Noel and Steve, missing a chance to say hello to Alan (sorry!) and listening to Eric tell me his gross story about breaking his ankle, I was on my way to Joey’s with a heart overflowing with confidence. People love me. I love them. There’s still a blog coming about that topic, though. Joey and I packed, became hungry, went to Applebee’s, had really bad service, gave our waiter a $5 tip anyhow, saw my step-dad and went back to packing. With Nick’s help we got almost everything out. The kitty cats might need therapy after the car ride, though. I was following Joey in the Mazda and decided to pass him. I saw Chessie sitting in his lap. When I called him, he said Hemi was hiding under the seat but Chessie was trying to co-pilot the Ion.
It was a lot of work to move Corr to the Corr's but I got to help unpack which is my favorite part of moving. I slept in the guest bedroom and felt like I was at a bed and breakfast.
Yes, this weekend was not full of joy but it was certainly a test of character. Will I be moved?
Facing Pain, Receiving Joy: Part 2
Ha! Yi! I did it! I got to part 2 :)
Saturday afternoon was Jenny’s bridal shower. It was interesting having it in my mom’s church, the church I will probably get married in. I was glad to help provide the location even though we wanted to have it at Riverview. Things were getting a little intense and I needed a minute to myself just to talk to God. I snuck into the dark sanctuary, bent my head and asked God for peace. Suddenly, the organ started and I almost leapt into heaven. My heart was pounding as I leaned to the right. I hadn’t even noticed the man sitting at the organ when I had walked in. I laughed to myself. How funny, God. I ask for peace and you send me loud organ music causing me to become more unnerved. But the music soon turned peaceful and relaxed me causing me to smile to the Lord, again. Always helping me. Healing me.
After the shower, I went to Joey’s to move some stuff to his parents. We ate the rest of the spaghetti (wait for it….) and then took boxes to his parents. They were about to leave for the Hill’s house to play cards. We were all laughing about stuff and I was feeling so secure. Joey and I discussed what to do after church, made our decision and then tried to set the plans into motion. They were a no go…and this is where my feelings got hurt pretty bad and when I allow my feelings to be hurt, Joey becomes angry at whatever the cause….even though the main cause is usually me. He wants to protect me and trust me on this one, he does step in and protect me from myself when necessary. However, he was hurt a little, too. So, we went to the Hill’s and hung out with some of my old teachers from Holt. While there, my grandma called upset. My cousin, Justin, had been home for only a few hours when he was called back to Indianapolis. They flew he and his company to Kuwait that night and soon after touching down in Kuwait, they entered into Iraq. It doesn’t sound like he’s going to a very nice area. Please pray for him to have courage and the Lord’s protection…and then pray for God’s will.
Joey and I went to Riv after our stop at the Hill’s. While standing in the lobby, I had a flash from the past approach me with a hug. My ex-boyfriend’s little cousin was there. She explained how she was now a sophomore at State and this was her second or third time coming to Riv. She also told me that Bush (the ex) had told her I go to Riv. She had hoped to see me and was so excited I was standing there. Now, crazy thing about all of this…I had a dream the night before about this girl when I hadn’t thought about her in sooo long. What a coincidence J I was really happy to know she was seeking a real relationship with Christ. I pray I see her again.
Joey and I visited with some of the newer people we have met this summer. I finally congratulated the Kranzos on their move to Boston but my heart is sad about them leaving. While standing there with them and the Fritzes (is that right?), I felt so safe and my hurt feelings stopped crying out for attention. However….I was a mess during church. At one point, I asked Joey if we could leave. He said no. I knew he was right and didn’t fight it. I was just so confused about many different things. Losing friends. Sharing friends. Wanting to feel comfortable with my friends. Wanting to do the right thing for Christ. The more Paul talked about the spiritual battle taking place inside of us, the more the battle inside of me intensified. We left in a hurry and went to my grandma’s.
After leaving her home, we decided to go to a safe place. Right now, I can’t explain what a safe place is. I guess, in making an attempt to explain, it is a place where I don’t have the shadow of the past hanging over my head. It’s a place I don’t have to worry about certain things in my life. I guess you could also refer to this safe place as running away. Anyhow, we went to the safe place and laughed with our safe place friends.
That night, I felt sick. So did Joey. It had to be the spaghetti. Damn, Emils.
Saturday afternoon was Jenny’s bridal shower. It was interesting having it in my mom’s church, the church I will probably get married in. I was glad to help provide the location even though we wanted to have it at Riverview. Things were getting a little intense and I needed a minute to myself just to talk to God. I snuck into the dark sanctuary, bent my head and asked God for peace. Suddenly, the organ started and I almost leapt into heaven. My heart was pounding as I leaned to the right. I hadn’t even noticed the man sitting at the organ when I had walked in. I laughed to myself. How funny, God. I ask for peace and you send me loud organ music causing me to become more unnerved. But the music soon turned peaceful and relaxed me causing me to smile to the Lord, again. Always helping me. Healing me.
After the shower, I went to Joey’s to move some stuff to his parents. We ate the rest of the spaghetti (wait for it….) and then took boxes to his parents. They were about to leave for the Hill’s house to play cards. We were all laughing about stuff and I was feeling so secure. Joey and I discussed what to do after church, made our decision and then tried to set the plans into motion. They were a no go…and this is where my feelings got hurt pretty bad and when I allow my feelings to be hurt, Joey becomes angry at whatever the cause….even though the main cause is usually me. He wants to protect me and trust me on this one, he does step in and protect me from myself when necessary. However, he was hurt a little, too. So, we went to the Hill’s and hung out with some of my old teachers from Holt. While there, my grandma called upset. My cousin, Justin, had been home for only a few hours when he was called back to Indianapolis. They flew he and his company to Kuwait that night and soon after touching down in Kuwait, they entered into Iraq. It doesn’t sound like he’s going to a very nice area. Please pray for him to have courage and the Lord’s protection…and then pray for God’s will.
Joey and I went to Riv after our stop at the Hill’s. While standing in the lobby, I had a flash from the past approach me with a hug. My ex-boyfriend’s little cousin was there. She explained how she was now a sophomore at State and this was her second or third time coming to Riv. She also told me that Bush (the ex) had told her I go to Riv. She had hoped to see me and was so excited I was standing there. Now, crazy thing about all of this…I had a dream the night before about this girl when I hadn’t thought about her in sooo long. What a coincidence J I was really happy to know she was seeking a real relationship with Christ. I pray I see her again.
Joey and I visited with some of the newer people we have met this summer. I finally congratulated the Kranzos on their move to Boston but my heart is sad about them leaving. While standing there with them and the Fritzes (is that right?), I felt so safe and my hurt feelings stopped crying out for attention. However….I was a mess during church. At one point, I asked Joey if we could leave. He said no. I knew he was right and didn’t fight it. I was just so confused about many different things. Losing friends. Sharing friends. Wanting to feel comfortable with my friends. Wanting to do the right thing for Christ. The more Paul talked about the spiritual battle taking place inside of us, the more the battle inside of me intensified. We left in a hurry and went to my grandma’s.
After leaving her home, we decided to go to a safe place. Right now, I can’t explain what a safe place is. I guess, in making an attempt to explain, it is a place where I don’t have the shadow of the past hanging over my head. It’s a place I don’t have to worry about certain things in my life. I guess you could also refer to this safe place as running away. Anyhow, we went to the safe place and laughed with our safe place friends.
That night, I felt sick. So did Joey. It had to be the spaghetti. Damn, Emils.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Facing Pain, Receiving Joy: Part 1
This weekend was such a painful, joyful experience. Is that possible? Of course...at least inside of my life.
Friday, Joey, Yi, my step-mom and I helped out with Backpacks of Hope. These are donated backpacks and items for schoolchildren without the means purchase the required necessities for school. My job was to check zippers on the backpacks and then cut the tags off. Not sure what Joey and Yi were doing. After helping out with that, Joey and I went to Emil’s (of course) to get spaghetti for two. We usually order it like this: no sausage and mushrooms on the side. This time, they gave us lots of meatballs and a meat sauce next to the marinara. It was yummy but about an hour later….I don’t know. Could something have been wrong with the meat? I asked Joey if he had any problems but he didn’t seem to. I dismissed my issues and met up with Yi at my mom’s. After much finagling, we managed to get the queen size air mattress into my bedroom. No room to walk. Pretty cozy.
Yi and I woke up early and made it down to the Shared Pregnancy Center 5K. My step-mom was already there, standing in the rain. Yi decided to run the 5K just before they began the race. This was my first time running in the rain. This was also the first time I ran on the Riverfront Trial. I had a great start and was having an awesome time with God. I prayed, ran with a smile, had joy flowing through my veins, felt swept up in the beauty of the raindrops hitting my face and the water. This trail runs through downtown Lansing and underneath some bridges.
As I approached one of the bridges, I realized someone was sleeping on the pavement. Yes, this run was taking me right by a homeless person. It was strange. Here I was running a 5K and looking forward to a hot shower and this person was sleeping under a bridge. I prayed and kept moving with the person on my mind.
It seemed like I reached the half way point sooner than I expected which boosted my confidence. The race route had us turn around and run the way we just came. It all felt so much easier than the time before. Of course, I pooped out a little when I saw the finish line. Still, I managed to finish in 28:45ish. I don’t have my exact time, though. Yi and Christine did awesome jobs as well.
Friday, Joey, Yi, my step-mom and I helped out with Backpacks of Hope. These are donated backpacks and items for schoolchildren without the means purchase the required necessities for school. My job was to check zippers on the backpacks and then cut the tags off. Not sure what Joey and Yi were doing. After helping out with that, Joey and I went to Emil’s (of course) to get spaghetti for two. We usually order it like this: no sausage and mushrooms on the side. This time, they gave us lots of meatballs and a meat sauce next to the marinara. It was yummy but about an hour later….I don’t know. Could something have been wrong with the meat? I asked Joey if he had any problems but he didn’t seem to. I dismissed my issues and met up with Yi at my mom’s. After much finagling, we managed to get the queen size air mattress into my bedroom. No room to walk. Pretty cozy.
Yi and I woke up early and made it down to the Shared Pregnancy Center 5K. My step-mom was already there, standing in the rain. Yi decided to run the 5K just before they began the race. This was my first time running in the rain. This was also the first time I ran on the Riverfront Trial. I had a great start and was having an awesome time with God. I prayed, ran with a smile, had joy flowing through my veins, felt swept up in the beauty of the raindrops hitting my face and the water. This trail runs through downtown Lansing and underneath some bridges.
As I approached one of the bridges, I realized someone was sleeping on the pavement. Yes, this run was taking me right by a homeless person. It was strange. Here I was running a 5K and looking forward to a hot shower and this person was sleeping under a bridge. I prayed and kept moving with the person on my mind.
It seemed like I reached the half way point sooner than I expected which boosted my confidence. The race route had us turn around and run the way we just came. It all felt so much easier than the time before. Of course, I pooped out a little when I saw the finish line. Still, I managed to finish in 28:45ish. I don’t have my exact time, though. Yi and Christine did awesome jobs as well.
Guess what today is in the world of me?!?!?!
Actually, I'm not too thrilled. I remember when I was dating my ex-boyfriend after a year. We were both 23 or so and I asked him what his intentions were. He said he didn't want to get married until he was...oh...32 or 33. I laughed and told him we would never work out because there was NO WAY I was waiting THAT LONG to get married.
I'm half way to 31. Is this some kind of joke, God?
Really, though, I love how Joey and I are waiting on the Lord to help us through this pre-engagement time. Just because our closest friends are getting engaged and married, we are waiting on God to move us. He has yet to settle our hearts but is instead working on us both, seperately and as a couple. So, I guess I can only be happy that it hasn't happened yet...I could have rushed that last relationship into a horrible marriage.
So...happy 1/2 birthday to me :) Another 1/2 year wiser than I was six months ago, right? Ha.
Actually, I'm not too thrilled. I remember when I was dating my ex-boyfriend after a year. We were both 23 or so and I asked him what his intentions were. He said he didn't want to get married until he was...oh...32 or 33. I laughed and told him we would never work out because there was NO WAY I was waiting THAT LONG to get married.
I'm half way to 31. Is this some kind of joke, God?
Really, though, I love how Joey and I are waiting on the Lord to help us through this pre-engagement time. Just because our closest friends are getting engaged and married, we are waiting on God to move us. He has yet to settle our hearts but is instead working on us both, seperately and as a couple. So, I guess I can only be happy that it hasn't happened yet...I could have rushed that last relationship into a horrible marriage.
So...happy 1/2 birthday to me :) Another 1/2 year wiser than I was six months ago, right? Ha.
Friday, August 18, 2006
Ha! Can't keep me down! I'm back....for now :)
Check out this article about The Power of One. Not what you think....
Check out this article about The Power of One. Not what you think....
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
So, Val blocked me from all blogspots and livejournals, again. Back to only posting on the weekends. And this blog will be a lot less active. See, you took me for granted again and look what happened :) Really, though, I think it was God. I wasn't handling something well and couldn't discipline myself to stop what I was doing. Well, now I can't do whatever it was I was doing. When I saw the blocked page, I didn't get upset or angry. I just smiled and shook my head. Yes, I get it, God. Thank you for protecting me from me.
Of course, now we all need to switch to something I can read at work. Dan, can you hook me up with your technology?
Of course, now we all need to switch to something I can read at work. Dan, can you hook me up with your technology?
Going To God First
I recently attended a Christian conference by a well known teacher. During the conference, she stressed to me the importance of going to God first. She asked, "how many of you out there get a problem and then go tell 5 of your friends and later that day remember to pray about the problem? You need to go to God first, not to your friends who don't know what they're doing, either. He wants to be number one in your life!"
I thought about this and relayed it to a close friend of mine. The next time you have a problem, stop and pray. Don't pick up the phone and call anyone. Stop and pray for God to send you someone to talk to about the problem. See what He does.
My friend and I agreed this was what we were going to do. That was last Thursday night. The next morning....I got a problem. Something hurt me and began to crush my spirits. I had been expecting this "thing" to happen but when it did, I was caught off guard. I CHOSE to be upset and hurt by the "thing" that happened. What did I do?
I called my boyfriend. I didn't go to God. I called JAC and carried on about how low I felt. Problem was, JAC had so much going on he didn't have time to deal with me. I hung up the phone even more hurt than I was before. Now what?
Oh yeah! God! I was supposed to go to Him first! So, I bowed my head and prayed hard, asking for forgiveness, asking for comfort and trusting God to send me the person HE wanted to help out with the issue.
I finished praying, looked up at my computer and within 5 minutes, I received one of the most beautiful e-mails I have ever received. It was from someone I met through Riverview and someone I consider to be one of my closest friends. For no reason at all, this friend praised me, encouraged me, lifted my spirits and he thanked me for sharing my struggles. At the end of the e-mail, he wrote, "Funny how we're sometimes used by God and don't even realize it, huh?"
Funny. I wonder if my friend knew God was using him at that moment.
I need to go to the Lord first and after going to Him, I need to TRUST in Him. Yes, seek counsel from others but the next time a major OR a minor issue shows up, bow your head and ask Him to send someone in your life to help you. And then have faith.
I thought about this and relayed it to a close friend of mine. The next time you have a problem, stop and pray. Don't pick up the phone and call anyone. Stop and pray for God to send you someone to talk to about the problem. See what He does.
My friend and I agreed this was what we were going to do. That was last Thursday night. The next morning....I got a problem. Something hurt me and began to crush my spirits. I had been expecting this "thing" to happen but when it did, I was caught off guard. I CHOSE to be upset and hurt by the "thing" that happened. What did I do?
I called my boyfriend. I didn't go to God. I called JAC and carried on about how low I felt. Problem was, JAC had so much going on he didn't have time to deal with me. I hung up the phone even more hurt than I was before. Now what?
Oh yeah! God! I was supposed to go to Him first! So, I bowed my head and prayed hard, asking for forgiveness, asking for comfort and trusting God to send me the person HE wanted to help out with the issue.
I finished praying, looked up at my computer and within 5 minutes, I received one of the most beautiful e-mails I have ever received. It was from someone I met through Riverview and someone I consider to be one of my closest friends. For no reason at all, this friend praised me, encouraged me, lifted my spirits and he thanked me for sharing my struggles. At the end of the e-mail, he wrote, "Funny how we're sometimes used by God and don't even realize it, huh?"
Funny. I wonder if my friend knew God was using him at that moment.
I need to go to the Lord first and after going to Him, I need to TRUST in Him. Yes, seek counsel from others but the next time a major OR a minor issue shows up, bow your head and ask Him to send someone in your life to help you. And then have faith.
Monday, August 07, 2006
A New Addiction
Check out this running tool from USA Track and Field. You no longer have to drive out your route to figure out how many miles it is. This lets you map out the route you want to run and the distance. I've put in 5 routes so far. Thanks, Mike Potter!
Reasons not to get out of bed today...
I remember when I first started dating Joey in 2003, I was like the little girl from the movie Signs: The water tastes funny.
Now, in the words of Dave Matthews, DON’T DRINK THE WATER (IF YOU LIVE IN MASON).
This is trying to anger me on so many levels.
And now, in the words of a soon to be former Mason resident: WTF...I have been drinking radioactive water!!!!!! No wonder I haven't been sleeping well :op
Other headlines that really tried to kill my joy this morning:
Now, in the words of Dave Matthews, DON’T DRINK THE WATER (IF YOU LIVE IN MASON).
This is trying to anger me on so many levels.
And now, in the words of a soon to be former Mason resident: WTF...I have been drinking radioactive water!!!!!! No wonder I haven't been sleeping well :op
Other headlines that really tried to kill my joy this morning:
- Breaking News: Woman Killed In I-275 Crash. The freeway remains closed in that area while police investigate. This is the freeway right next to where I work. I mean, I am right off the ramp. I take this freeway every day to get to work. How sad.
- Local Murder at Apartment Complex This was in Holt. Very near where our friends live. Very near where my family lives.
- Mom Killed During Teen's Driving Lesson
- New worry for drivers: BP shuts oilfield
So, I started to go down that road of feeling hopeless but I quickly grabbed my joy before it flew out the sunroof. I remembered something important. Something that had been reaffirmed for me this weekend. I am saved. I am passed over in a good way. We have friends who care about us soooo much. We have people who are quickly becoming new friends who care about us soooo much. No. I will continue to have joy even as I pay 3.25 for gas (if that should happen).
And Yi, I loved your post. I could relate to it well this morning.
Friday, August 04, 2006
Dad: So, I was talking to your niece last night and I told her about the mosh pit I accidentally got myself into during the Fuel concert a few years ago.
Me: The one at Common Ground?
Dad: Yeah. Then she told me she's been in a mosh pit.
Me: She's nine. How has she been in a mosh pit?
Dad: Apparently, it was at Riverview.
Me: Riverview?
Dad: Yeah, your church.
Me: Huh.
Dad: That's what I said. What is she doing in a mosh pit at your church?
Me: It must have been during that punk concert.
Dad: You must know what my next question is going to be...
Me: Yeah...I do.
Me: The one at Common Ground?
Dad: Yeah. Then she told me she's been in a mosh pit.
Me: She's nine. How has she been in a mosh pit?
Dad: Apparently, it was at Riverview.
Me: Riverview?
Dad: Yeah, your church.
Me: Huh.
Dad: That's what I said. What is she doing in a mosh pit at your church?
Me: It must have been during that punk concert.
Dad: You must know what my next question is going to be...
Me: Yeah...I do.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Peace, freedom and the opposite of being alone
"I knew I was alone, but I think I've been secretly hoping that I would meet someone eventually and all that would change. Your insight makes sense and in a sense has given me some peace. Peace similar to what I felt the day I let go of Christianity. I'm no longer concerned with achieving something that feels so far out of my grasp. Now I can just live."
I read this comment on someone's blog and it made me stop....stare...go numb...feel sick. I don't know who this person is because I was fishing around in blog world. It was by accident I saw it...well...maybe. I'm not sure if I could get into a lot of trouble for posting it but I just had to. I need these thoughts in my life because they will come at me again and again. I need some adversity in my life otherwise, how will I grow spirtually?
I feel for this woman. I really do. I do not judge her because she "let go" of Christianity. I appreciate her openness.
I read a quote the other day: Christianity is not a religion or a philosophy, but a relationship and a lifestyle. The core of that lifestyle is thinking of others, as Jesus did, instead of ourselves.
Then there is this PDL quote: Becoming like Christ does not mean losing your personality or becoming a mindless clone. God created your uniqueness, so he certainly doesn't want to destroy it. Christlikeness is all about transforming your character, not your personality.
So, you read a lot of my posts and may think a couple of different things:
1.) Holly is a Jesus Freak.
2.) This isn't the Holly I've known.
3.) I love how Holly shares her stuggles in life.
4.) Holly struggles too much...maybe she should give up on this Christian thing, too.
Those were the thoughts that went through my head when I first read the quote. But then I thought about where I have been and what Christ has done in my life:
*I know and can accept I am an imperfect human being only saved by Christ's blood.
*God loves me the same when I succeed and fail. He DOES see me as perfect because He sees me through the blood of Christ. My sins are forgiven.
*I stopped using drugs.
*I stopped abusing alcohol.
*I stopped hurting my soul.
*I recognize how I hurt people.
*I recognize my selfish needs.
*I still love Buffett.
*I still love Johnny Cash.
*I see Christ helping get rid of the bad stuff I have held on to.
*I see my character changing for the better.
I let go, too. I let go off so much crap when I gave it to God to worry about. This is why I hang on. I feel much more free than I did before i was a follower. Yes, I actually feel more free. And peace is within me, too even with every struggle because the creator of the universe loves me. Yes, He actually loves me and wants to help me. I am not alone.
It is nothing I do. It is everything He has done.
And now...a song we sing at Riv (yes, we really do):
What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
What can make me whole again?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
I read this comment on someone's blog and it made me stop....stare...go numb...feel sick. I don't know who this person is because I was fishing around in blog world. It was by accident I saw it...well...maybe. I'm not sure if I could get into a lot of trouble for posting it but I just had to. I need these thoughts in my life because they will come at me again and again. I need some adversity in my life otherwise, how will I grow spirtually?
I feel for this woman. I really do. I do not judge her because she "let go" of Christianity. I appreciate her openness.
I read a quote the other day: Christianity is not a religion or a philosophy, but a relationship and a lifestyle. The core of that lifestyle is thinking of others, as Jesus did, instead of ourselves.
Then there is this PDL quote: Becoming like Christ does not mean losing your personality or becoming a mindless clone. God created your uniqueness, so he certainly doesn't want to destroy it. Christlikeness is all about transforming your character, not your personality.
So, you read a lot of my posts and may think a couple of different things:
1.) Holly is a Jesus Freak.
2.) This isn't the Holly I've known.
3.) I love how Holly shares her stuggles in life.
4.) Holly struggles too much...maybe she should give up on this Christian thing, too.
Those were the thoughts that went through my head when I first read the quote. But then I thought about where I have been and what Christ has done in my life:
*I know and can accept I am an imperfect human being only saved by Christ's blood.
*God loves me the same when I succeed and fail. He DOES see me as perfect because He sees me through the blood of Christ. My sins are forgiven.
*I stopped using drugs.
*I stopped abusing alcohol.
*I stopped hurting my soul.
*I recognize how I hurt people.
*I recognize my selfish needs.
*I still love Buffett.
*I still love Johnny Cash.
*I see Christ helping get rid of the bad stuff I have held on to.
*I see my character changing for the better.
I let go, too. I let go off so much crap when I gave it to God to worry about. This is why I hang on. I feel much more free than I did before i was a follower. Yes, I actually feel more free. And peace is within me, too even with every struggle because the creator of the universe loves me. Yes, He actually loves me and wants to help me. I am not alone.
It is nothing I do. It is everything He has done.
And now...a song we sing at Riv (yes, we really do):
What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus;
What can make me whole again?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.
Stop Wishing and Start Pressing
A story from JM:
I give away a lot of my clothes. There is a woman who works for me in my home and when it comes time to give these clothes away, she says, “oh, I wish I could fit into your clothes. They would look so good on me if I could just lose the weight.” The next time came around to give away more clothes. She said, “I really wish I could fit into your clothes. I hate watching them move through the house and out the door to someone else. I wish…” A month ago, it came time again. This time, however, she said, “you know what? I am going to fit into your clothes. I’m going to start eating better and get more exercise. I’m going to be the first person in line to try on those clothes.” See what she did? She turned her “wish” into a “going to”.
Stop wishing and start pressing for what you want in life.
I give away a lot of my clothes. There is a woman who works for me in my home and when it comes time to give these clothes away, she says, “oh, I wish I could fit into your clothes. They would look so good on me if I could just lose the weight.” The next time came around to give away more clothes. She said, “I really wish I could fit into your clothes. I hate watching them move through the house and out the door to someone else. I wish…” A month ago, it came time again. This time, however, she said, “you know what? I am going to fit into your clothes. I’m going to start eating better and get more exercise. I’m going to be the first person in line to try on those clothes.” See what she did? She turned her “wish” into a “going to”.
Stop wishing and start pressing for what you want in life.
I'm not about to complain
Why should I even breathe a breath of complaint about the heat or electric bills? I can pay them. I have air. I stay fairly cool. Other reasons not to complain about the heat from CNN headlines:
- Heat suspected in 20 deaths nationwide since Sunday; 164 Californians died last week
- Pregnant woman dies at sweltering Red Sox game; baby saved
- Heat warnings posted from Massachusetts to South Carolina
- Zookeepers feed lions frozen blood to cool off
On another note, I made chilli Tuesday night and forgot to put chilli powder in it. Not that great.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Rolling Blackouts
It's hot outside. Last night, I finally went to get the mail around 10:30 p.m. I looked up at the clear night and smiled. Yes, I noticed it was humid and still really hot out but I sensed a peace in the stars and black sky. I almost forgot what had taken place across the street in February. I remembered that when I saw Jimmy's house on the way back to my door. By the time I got to my front step, I was ready to go back in because...
Man, it's hot outside.
I will embrace it, though. It is August 1 and I don't like the fall so I will embrace these summer months and all that goes along with it.
That being said, I received this e-mail from my step-mom this morning:
This is the first time I can remember this happening since I worked for the State (25 years). A directive from the gov is attached. Our overheads are all out and the temp rising. They stopped all road work on Michigan. The county is having rolling blackouts and there are pockets around Lansing that do not have any electricity - which would be awful. So a little is better than none. I hope Chuck turned the air off before he left home.
Dear Staff, At this link you will find an Executive Directive regarding energy usage for the next two days.
In an effort to comply with the Governors Directive, we will be shutting down overhead lights here in the Lansing Office to the greatest extent possible. The large light banks draw much more energy than your task lights (the lights under your overhead shelves) so we ask you to work with task light only. If this proves impossible, lights may be turned on, but lets see what we can live with. I believe the Detroit Office in Cadillac Place will be taking similar measures.
We will also be adjusting the cooling temperature upward so you may feel a change. Please bear with us as we work to meet this Directive.
This Directive expires Wednesday evening. Thanks for doing your part.
It's hot outside.
Man, it's hot outside.
I will embrace it, though. It is August 1 and I don't like the fall so I will embrace these summer months and all that goes along with it.
That being said, I received this e-mail from my step-mom this morning:
This is the first time I can remember this happening since I worked for the State (25 years). A directive from the gov is attached. Our overheads are all out and the temp rising. They stopped all road work on Michigan. The county is having rolling blackouts and there are pockets around Lansing that do not have any electricity - which would be awful. So a little is better than none. I hope Chuck turned the air off before he left home.
Dear Staff, At this link you will find an Executive Directive regarding energy usage for the next two days.
In an effort to comply with the Governors Directive, we will be shutting down overhead lights here in the Lansing Office to the greatest extent possible. The large light banks draw much more energy than your task lights (the lights under your overhead shelves) so we ask you to work with task light only. If this proves impossible, lights may be turned on, but lets see what we can live with. I believe the Detroit Office in Cadillac Place will be taking similar measures.
We will also be adjusting the cooling temperature upward so you may feel a change. Please bear with us as we work to meet this Directive.
This Directive expires Wednesday evening. Thanks for doing your part.
It's hot outside.
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