Faithfully

So, about two months ago, I screwed up pretty badly. The high horse I was riding on decided to buck me off. Well, I wouldn't really say I was on a high horse...I just had a problem with Christians ignoring their sin patterns. I do stupid stuff that does not glorify God. I did something pretty stupid. I guess that's what makes us all human. But as I went to bed that night, I actually asked God to punish me. I wanted to be grounded or something. I wanted to feel the discipline so that I could repent.

The next morning, I woke up humming a little tune. I felt happy and the tune became louder. I suddenly realized I was singing "Faithfully" by Journey. Huh? Had I heard that song the night before? No...weird....

As I lay there half awake, I heard Noel's voice say inside my head, "Even when you're not faithful, He is."

I sat up in my bed with tears in my eyes.

Yes, there are consequences to my actions, good and bad but there was no punishment. By asking for it, I was negating what Christ already did for me. I wasn't faithful but Christ was. He would heal me if I let Him and I was going to let Him. I confessed the sin to a close friend, repented and hopped right back on the road. I cycled a little bit and started to fall a little bit more but God's righteous hand either slapped me up for being so stupid....or it caught me.