I met this girl and she told me her Jesus story. Someone had accused her of not being a Christian. Her response was "bite me." I knew then this girl and I would be friends :o) The question, though, stuck with me along with one I was asked a couple of weeks ago: how does Christ work in your life? Then, Saturday night, I'm riding along with the person who raised me and I blurted out, "Do you think everyone goes to heaven, even if they don't believe in Christ? Do you think all religions are equally right and worship the same God?" I won't tell you the answers I got but let's just say...it made me sad.
So....yeah...I've got a question for you. We toss around this Christian word but what does it mean to be a Christian...to you and to others?
Anyone?
Bueller?
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
I'll regret this post...I already do...
We are going over the Parables at church. I’m glad I’m a Christian but man…I still feel like a failure most of the time. I guess it’s a good thing when Christ points things out to me that I might be doing wrong. Really, I know I’m not a failure but I feel like I do a ton of sh*t wrong. Yeah, I felt like a swear. Anyhow, I really meant to blog more about the Parables but its hard to blog about anything when the stuff that’s on my mind can’t be written about. I guess I’ll ask for prayers for my family…if you could.
I remember the Shattered series when Noel talked about the pieces of the mirror. I know I'm picking up a shard of glass and thinking, "I can't be used." How silly is that? I see God using me in so many ways. I need to get away from the crappy self pity. I guess that's what happens when things continue to fall down around you even when you give it your best...and then when that doesn't work, you start to give nothing at all.
PS: I feel so damn lucky I live in the Midwest. The only thing my home doesn’t protect me from is fire. Other than that, I’m safe in my little bubble. I wish I had the ambition to go down south and actually help them with my own hands. Instead, I put them together and talk to God. I just can’t imagine… Why do I feel so spoiled? I feel like a little brat who’s got everything she could possibly need or want…yet she wants more. I need to change my attitude like right now.
I remember the Shattered series when Noel talked about the pieces of the mirror. I know I'm picking up a shard of glass and thinking, "I can't be used." How silly is that? I see God using me in so many ways. I need to get away from the crappy self pity. I guess that's what happens when things continue to fall down around you even when you give it your best...and then when that doesn't work, you start to give nothing at all.
PS: I feel so damn lucky I live in the Midwest. The only thing my home doesn’t protect me from is fire. Other than that, I’m safe in my little bubble. I wish I had the ambition to go down south and actually help them with my own hands. Instead, I put them together and talk to God. I just can’t imagine… Why do I feel so spoiled? I feel like a little brat who’s got everything she could possibly need or want…yet she wants more. I need to change my attitude like right now.
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Monday, August 22, 2005
Open Letter
Sometimes I write about things and You can see that I’m getting it. You smile on me to encourage my strides. Sometimes, I get cocky, too self-righteous. So You humble me. Sometimes You see how I think I’m right but I’m clearly wrong, either misunderstanding Your word, twisting it to suit my wants, or blatantly ignoring it.
I enter church on Sunday morning, always feeling good about my walk but almost every time, somewhere during the service, I start to get angry. The pastors except so much from us! Last week it was anger management. A time before they talked about being a missionary and this week the topic was about not trying to throw out the non-Christians. Every single week, they point out an area that most of us suck at so I’m constantly feeling like a failure.
You know that crazy pastor You put in a leadership role at Riv? Yeah, You know which one I’m talking about. He taught on parables this weekend. He discussed several of the parables You taught on but the one that really got to me was the one about the weeds and the wheat. I’m sure You know which one I’m referring to. The farmer plants the wheat and then the mean dude comes along and plants the gross weed, mixing up the wheat and the weeds. You said not to pull out the weeds even though when the weeds grew, they would look just like wheat except that the weeds cause diarrhea and vomiting. You want the wheat (Christians) to grow with the weeds (pre-Christians & non-Christians). As your follower, I shouldn’t try to weed people out. If You don’t, what gives me the right? Was I doing this in my rant about homosexuality? Do I do this in my life? Why do I feel like the pastors are talking directly to me? Why do my friends think they are talking directly to them?
This is where the anger starts. Why try if I’m never going to get the whole picture? Why even show up if they are just going to point out all of these areas in which I thought I was doing okay because of a previous teaching but now I find that I suck? Church makes me feel like crap.
So why do I bother? Why do I keep showing up week after week? Why do I look forward not only to the people, but to the music and especially the teaching?
Because of You.
I can safely, confidently, loyally and faithfully answer certain questions when asked. I’m not a poser. You know my heart. You saved my life. You speak to me through these lessons and calm my frustrations. Once I get through my frustrations, I see the lesson You want me to learn (but why so many?!?!).
A question was asked during the service: list your non-Christian friends. I could have gone on and on. My problem was that I didn’t have any Christian friends! I knew I needed some, too and thanks to several programs and to the mission trip, I do now. But back to those pre-Christian friends of mine…
I went to a pig roast on Saturday night. I was a girl surrounded by refugees. They all spoke of sex in a vulgar, disgusting manner. They all talked about getting wasted and how they deserved it. They even spoke of drugs and were under the influence. As I sat around the camp fire, kind of keeping to myself, the following conversation took place:
Woman #1: Can you believe so and so is going to wait until she gets married?!
Woman #2: That’s absurd.
Woman #1: I know! I mean I can’t imagine not knowing if the guy is going to be horrible in bed or not. You’ve got to know before you spend the rest of your life with him!
Me: (ever so sweetly) Well, isn’t it true that even after you get married, it still takes years and years and tons of practice to become sexually compatible?
Woman #1: Well….(thoughtful look of “maybe you have a point”)
Me: I think its awesome that she’s waiting until marriage.
Subject changes.
As I drove home that night, I thought about the difference in hanging out with my Christian friends and my non-Christian friends. I do tend to feel slightly more comfortable with the Christian friends. Some subjects are just off limits because of disrespectful topics. I don’t have to worry about drunkenness or drugs. But the rest is pretty much the same. When I’m with both sets, we laugh and joke and dance and tease. When I’m around the Christians, there isn’t a bunch of God talk. We don’t sit around and sing Kumbia. In fact, we rarely do talk about spirituality (I wonder why that is) but I also know it’s an open door policy. If I say something about You or Christianity, I don’t get weird looks (for the most part). Things definitely are more centered around You.
As I drove home, I thought about the differences in hanging with both groups. I wanted out of the weeds. I considered that perhaps it would be better to only hang with Christ Followers from now on. I punked out. When that crazy guy brought it up Sunday, it made me realize I was wrong. I had forgotten my purpose and You quickly averted me from a self righteous path.
I need to be in the weeds because I teach them by representing You. “We are…Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us.” 2 Corinthians 5:20. My friends know they can count on me for prayer and a tender understanding of their struggles. When they are feeling lost, they come to me and I try with a God centered ear. Non-Christians will find shelter in Christians. It might even be that I need the weeds. The weeds offer a “real-world” view, if you will. They challenge us and offer us trials which make us stronger. How beautiful.
Thank You, again, for sticking with me. Your love doesn’t seem to run out on me no matter how frustrating I am and this is why I bother. This is how I know my aggravation isn’t directed at the people You’ve chosen to teach us. My anger is really just at myself. I just struggle, along with the rest of the world.
I enter church on Sunday morning, always feeling good about my walk but almost every time, somewhere during the service, I start to get angry. The pastors except so much from us! Last week it was anger management. A time before they talked about being a missionary and this week the topic was about not trying to throw out the non-Christians. Every single week, they point out an area that most of us suck at so I’m constantly feeling like a failure.
You know that crazy pastor You put in a leadership role at Riv? Yeah, You know which one I’m talking about. He taught on parables this weekend. He discussed several of the parables You taught on but the one that really got to me was the one about the weeds and the wheat. I’m sure You know which one I’m referring to. The farmer plants the wheat and then the mean dude comes along and plants the gross weed, mixing up the wheat and the weeds. You said not to pull out the weeds even though when the weeds grew, they would look just like wheat except that the weeds cause diarrhea and vomiting. You want the wheat (Christians) to grow with the weeds (pre-Christians & non-Christians). As your follower, I shouldn’t try to weed people out. If You don’t, what gives me the right? Was I doing this in my rant about homosexuality? Do I do this in my life? Why do I feel like the pastors are talking directly to me? Why do my friends think they are talking directly to them?
This is where the anger starts. Why try if I’m never going to get the whole picture? Why even show up if they are just going to point out all of these areas in which I thought I was doing okay because of a previous teaching but now I find that I suck? Church makes me feel like crap.
So why do I bother? Why do I keep showing up week after week? Why do I look forward not only to the people, but to the music and especially the teaching?
Because of You.
I can safely, confidently, loyally and faithfully answer certain questions when asked. I’m not a poser. You know my heart. You saved my life. You speak to me through these lessons and calm my frustrations. Once I get through my frustrations, I see the lesson You want me to learn (but why so many?!?!).
A question was asked during the service: list your non-Christian friends. I could have gone on and on. My problem was that I didn’t have any Christian friends! I knew I needed some, too and thanks to several programs and to the mission trip, I do now. But back to those pre-Christian friends of mine…
I went to a pig roast on Saturday night. I was a girl surrounded by refugees. They all spoke of sex in a vulgar, disgusting manner. They all talked about getting wasted and how they deserved it. They even spoke of drugs and were under the influence. As I sat around the camp fire, kind of keeping to myself, the following conversation took place:
Woman #1: Can you believe so and so is going to wait until she gets married?!
Woman #2: That’s absurd.
Woman #1: I know! I mean I can’t imagine not knowing if the guy is going to be horrible in bed or not. You’ve got to know before you spend the rest of your life with him!
Me: (ever so sweetly) Well, isn’t it true that even after you get married, it still takes years and years and tons of practice to become sexually compatible?
Woman #1: Well….(thoughtful look of “maybe you have a point”)
Me: I think its awesome that she’s waiting until marriage.
Subject changes.
As I drove home that night, I thought about the difference in hanging out with my Christian friends and my non-Christian friends. I do tend to feel slightly more comfortable with the Christian friends. Some subjects are just off limits because of disrespectful topics. I don’t have to worry about drunkenness or drugs. But the rest is pretty much the same. When I’m with both sets, we laugh and joke and dance and tease. When I’m around the Christians, there isn’t a bunch of God talk. We don’t sit around and sing Kumbia. In fact, we rarely do talk about spirituality (I wonder why that is) but I also know it’s an open door policy. If I say something about You or Christianity, I don’t get weird looks (for the most part). Things definitely are more centered around You.
As I drove home, I thought about the differences in hanging with both groups. I wanted out of the weeds. I considered that perhaps it would be better to only hang with Christ Followers from now on. I punked out. When that crazy guy brought it up Sunday, it made me realize I was wrong. I had forgotten my purpose and You quickly averted me from a self righteous path.
I need to be in the weeds because I teach them by representing You. “We are…Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us.” 2 Corinthians 5:20. My friends know they can count on me for prayer and a tender understanding of their struggles. When they are feeling lost, they come to me and I try with a God centered ear. Non-Christians will find shelter in Christians. It might even be that I need the weeds. The weeds offer a “real-world” view, if you will. They challenge us and offer us trials which make us stronger. How beautiful.
Thank You, again, for sticking with me. Your love doesn’t seem to run out on me no matter how frustrating I am and this is why I bother. This is how I know my aggravation isn’t directed at the people You’ve chosen to teach us. My anger is really just at myself. I just struggle, along with the rest of the world.
Friday, August 19, 2005
My response to VRA because I have links and don't know how to use html.
Oh boy. I knew it would be you, VRA :) I love you sooooo much. Here are my thoughts on your comments.
First, thank you for all of them! I can see that you care enough to take the time to look things up and see what the church believes. That is awesome of you.
Second: the Bible. Do I agree with the Bible 100%? No. Do I follow the Bible 100%? Well…I try and my desire is to do so. Why? Because I believe the Bible is the clear, direct word of God. He inspired it and wrote it through the prophets. I have faith that if I follow the Bible, I would live a righteous life. Of course, I’m a human who falls short…a lot. I used to think the Bible was full of fables, tales to explain the way things are in a godly view. Now, after taking a class, talking with other Christians, listening to other Christians, even reading and listening to scholars discuss the Bible (oh, and reading the Bible itself), I accept it for what it is. I used to say, “the Bible contradicts itself.” I learned early on from a woman I work with that the Bible does not contradict. If you read it all the way through, the Bible answers itself. When it seems to contradict in the Old Testament (OT) it will fulfill itself in the New (NT). My pastor presented one of the most awesome studies on the Bible to prove the accuracy of the book. I could send you the CD or the PDF of the presentation (its kind of funny) but only if you wanted to see a timeline of the Bible and how it stands up to other early works.
Also, here is something I have learned about God. He and I tend to disagree but who am I to not trust Him? I mean, He’s God. I’m little old me. Dave has an interesting way of explaining the Bible to his youth group. Perhaps he’ll post it. My thing is that I cannot pick and choose from the Bible. That is too wishy-washy. I either believe it or I don’t. I cannot take what I personally like and discard what I don’t. There are lots of things I don’t like but I accept it because it is from God. I once heard a commentator say, “wouldn’t it be cool if we knew what God wanted from us? If we could learn to actually know Him? If we knew what His views are? We do! It’s called the Bible.” He gave it to us to help us. We need to understand who God is. Is He a big Santa Claus in the sky? Is he a fearsome awesome God who is waiting for us to screw up so he can beat us down? The Bible teaches us something different. He is our loving father, but also the Lord of Lords, King of Kings. He created us for HIS purpose, to glorify and love him. We do not conform God to us by picking and choosing from His word. We look at His word and see where we fall short. We live to glorify Him.
Third, the 10 Commandments. This is a tough one, VRA. You’re right that the 10 Commandments do not list anything about homosexuality. Did you know there are more than just 10 commandments? The list goes on and on after Moses gives the first ten. What I have learned about the 10 commandments is that God made them as a measure. He made them knowing we could never meet them. This is a hard concept to understand and it took me a long time to get it. Those commandments show us that we are not God. Jesus came along and did away with the old law by fulfilling it. I did my own study of this by writing out the old commandments and then reading through the gospels (Matt, Mark, Luke, John). Jesus reveals the true intent of Mosaic Law in Matthew 5:17. From there He goes on to explain and fulfill the old law. I'm not sure if any of that makes sense. I know what I'm trying to say but doing so in a response is not the easiest.
Now…the other part of all this. Everyone loves 1Corinthians13 and uses it for their wedding. Most people start reading there. They miss this one. Click here for 1Corinthians 6:9-10. You can even change the version of the Bible if you want. Don’t feel comfortable outside of the King James version? Then you can translate it…anyway you pretty much want…but you can't change the statement itself. It goes on to talk more about sexual immorality. God gives us a choice and we are free to do as we please. But as we know and teach our own children, there are consequences to some of our choices. I urge you to also take a look at Romans 1:24-27 . NOW, while I write all of this, I have no doubt that you think I’m a Jesus Freak. Hear my heart on this: I’m in the same boat as every other sinner. I do not condemn homosexuals for their actions, however I would never knowingly support a brothel or someone's drug habit. Why would I support an organization that suggests gay is good? I want people in general to be loved and understand the love Christ has for all of us but I hope people wouldn't hold me under the water while I'm drowning.
This is such a hot topic. I can’t believe I even tried to respond on a blog. But there it is. I'm posting here rather than just writing you in case I get anything wrong. I don't want to give wrong info. I also encourage you, if you don’t already, to get a Bible you can understand while reading. Joey had to kick me in the butt to get me to use something other than King James. I thought that was the only translation that was true. Not so. It’s just another translation. I have an NIV Bible which has little sections that go into more depth and help you understand the Bible better. It is called a Student Bible and is published by Zondervan. Great times with me and my Bible :)
Oh, I love you, VRA. I really do. I’m glad we can all discuss this with respect for one other. Thanks, Peeps!
First, thank you for all of them! I can see that you care enough to take the time to look things up and see what the church believes. That is awesome of you.
Second: the Bible. Do I agree with the Bible 100%? No. Do I follow the Bible 100%? Well…I try and my desire is to do so. Why? Because I believe the Bible is the clear, direct word of God. He inspired it and wrote it through the prophets. I have faith that if I follow the Bible, I would live a righteous life. Of course, I’m a human who falls short…a lot. I used to think the Bible was full of fables, tales to explain the way things are in a godly view. Now, after taking a class, talking with other Christians, listening to other Christians, even reading and listening to scholars discuss the Bible (oh, and reading the Bible itself), I accept it for what it is. I used to say, “the Bible contradicts itself.” I learned early on from a woman I work with that the Bible does not contradict. If you read it all the way through, the Bible answers itself. When it seems to contradict in the Old Testament (OT) it will fulfill itself in the New (NT). My pastor presented one of the most awesome studies on the Bible to prove the accuracy of the book. I could send you the CD or the PDF of the presentation (its kind of funny) but only if you wanted to see a timeline of the Bible and how it stands up to other early works.
Also, here is something I have learned about God. He and I tend to disagree but who am I to not trust Him? I mean, He’s God. I’m little old me. Dave has an interesting way of explaining the Bible to his youth group. Perhaps he’ll post it. My thing is that I cannot pick and choose from the Bible. That is too wishy-washy. I either believe it or I don’t. I cannot take what I personally like and discard what I don’t. There are lots of things I don’t like but I accept it because it is from God. I once heard a commentator say, “wouldn’t it be cool if we knew what God wanted from us? If we could learn to actually know Him? If we knew what His views are? We do! It’s called the Bible.” He gave it to us to help us. We need to understand who God is. Is He a big Santa Claus in the sky? Is he a fearsome awesome God who is waiting for us to screw up so he can beat us down? The Bible teaches us something different. He is our loving father, but also the Lord of Lords, King of Kings. He created us for HIS purpose, to glorify and love him. We do not conform God to us by picking and choosing from His word. We look at His word and see where we fall short. We live to glorify Him.
Third, the 10 Commandments. This is a tough one, VRA. You’re right that the 10 Commandments do not list anything about homosexuality. Did you know there are more than just 10 commandments? The list goes on and on after Moses gives the first ten. What I have learned about the 10 commandments is that God made them as a measure. He made them knowing we could never meet them. This is a hard concept to understand and it took me a long time to get it. Those commandments show us that we are not God. Jesus came along and did away with the old law by fulfilling it. I did my own study of this by writing out the old commandments and then reading through the gospels (Matt, Mark, Luke, John). Jesus reveals the true intent of Mosaic Law in Matthew 5:17. From there He goes on to explain and fulfill the old law. I'm not sure if any of that makes sense. I know what I'm trying to say but doing so in a response is not the easiest.
Now…the other part of all this. Everyone loves 1Corinthians13 and uses it for their wedding. Most people start reading there. They miss this one. Click here for 1Corinthians 6:9-10. You can even change the version of the Bible if you want. Don’t feel comfortable outside of the King James version? Then you can translate it…anyway you pretty much want…but you can't change the statement itself. It goes on to talk more about sexual immorality. God gives us a choice and we are free to do as we please. But as we know and teach our own children, there are consequences to some of our choices. I urge you to also take a look at Romans 1:24-27 . NOW, while I write all of this, I have no doubt that you think I’m a Jesus Freak. Hear my heart on this: I’m in the same boat as every other sinner. I do not condemn homosexuals for their actions, however I would never knowingly support a brothel or someone's drug habit. Why would I support an organization that suggests gay is good? I want people in general to be loved and understand the love Christ has for all of us but I hope people wouldn't hold me under the water while I'm drowning.
This is such a hot topic. I can’t believe I even tried to respond on a blog. But there it is. I'm posting here rather than just writing you in case I get anything wrong. I don't want to give wrong info. I also encourage you, if you don’t already, to get a Bible you can understand while reading. Joey had to kick me in the butt to get me to use something other than King James. I thought that was the only translation that was true. Not so. It’s just another translation. I have an NIV Bible which has little sections that go into more depth and help you understand the Bible better. It is called a Student Bible and is published by Zondervan. Great times with me and my Bible :)
Oh, I love you, VRA. I really do. I’m glad we can all discuss this with respect for one other. Thanks, Peeps!
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