Stay

I meant to post this back in February but it seems appropriate to do it now.



Stay lyrics

I've been sitting here staring at the clock on the wall

And I've been laying here praying, praying she won't call

It's just another call from home

And you'll get it and be gone

And I'll be crying



And I'll be begging you, baby

Beg you not to leave

But I'll be left here waiting

With my Heart on my sleeve

Oh, for the next time we'll be here

Seems like a million years

And I think I'm dying



What do I have to do to make you see

She can't love you like me

Why don't you stay

I'm down on my knees

I'm so tired of being lonely

Don't I give you what you need

When she calls you to go

There is one thing you should know

We don't have to live this way

Baby, why don't you stay

This is the #1 song on the country stations right now. Every time it has come on, I’ve listened to half of the song and then turned it. It was too painful for me to listen to. I’ve been this girl before. I’ve put myself into hurtful, damaging, twisted love triangles. Not just one time but several times. I’ve done it as a pre-Christian and as a follower of Christ. I’m not immune to pain just because I follow Him. That’s silly. But there is something about the pain I went through before Christ and after Him. Maybe the pain isn’t different but the healing was. And the lyrics of this song…dang. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about being in that place again.



You keep telling me, baby

There will come a time

When you will leave her arms

And forever be in mine

But I don't think that's the truth

And I don't like being used and I'm tired of waiting

It's too much pain to have to bare

To love a man you have to share



Why don't you stay

I'm down on my knees

I'm so tired of being lonely

Don't I give you what you need

When she calls you to go

There is one thing you should know

We don't have to live this way

Baby, why don't you stay

A few weeks ago, we were talking about sex at Riverview during the Exposed series. This series will forever be of help to me. I always thought it was my right to have sex with whomever I wanted but the truth…the actual no-bullshit truth is that every time I had sex with someone and then we broke up, a piece of me was now missing. When Mark Brett taught one weekend, he glued two boards together and then snapped them apart. The pieces were still glued together. It was difficult to watch. We need to have fun sex. We need to have one sex. It is for our own well being and safety. I see that now. It is for a husband and a wife and it is supposed to keep them together forever…not just the few months they dated…not just when my self esteem is low...not just to prove a point...not just because I can....



I was thinking about this the other day in the car. It was so much easier to get over a lost "love" when I was in junior high and part of high school. At a certain point, breaking up became traumitizing to me. Why? Partly because sex was involved. It made everything so complicated. There weren't any more simple good-byes. Now, it was the board snapping in half...a part of me staying behind and me taking a part of someone else along with me. But I didn't see it that way. Again, it was my right and it wasn't hurting anyone. But I completely see the lie in that thinking. I see the horrible pain it caused to me and still causes people I love.


But Jesus heals. He has healed me and forgiven me of my sins. He told me not to do what I was doing but still was there to comfort me when I did it anyway. Jesus heals.

For the first time, I listened to the rest of the "Stay" song:



I can't take it any longer

But my will is getting stronger

And I think I know just what I have to do

I can't waste another minute

After all that I've put in it

I've given you my best

Why does she get the best of you

So next time you find you wanna leave her bed for mine



Why don't you stay

I'm up off my knees

I'm so tired of being lonely

You can't give me what I need

When she begs you not to go

There is one thing you should know

I don't have to live this way

Baby, why don't you stay, yeah



I'd like to think the singer was at Riverview hearing how she was free from sinning. I'd like to think she reached out to Jesus and he helped her break away. I'd like to think it was God she turned to and He helped her heal. Well, that's my story at least and maybe I'll keep thinking that's what the singer went through.