Downer

I've been a real downer lately. Trying to shake it only makes me feel worse. I'm just not happy here at work. Either Satan is meddling in my projects, royally screwing them up or God is trying to show me that it has been time for me to leave...for a long time now. I don't know. I just know that when I'm here, I'm miserable. The worst part is that it shows. Yesterday, someone sent me an e-card saying she misses my smile. A guy who works in the bindery stopped me on my way out to ask me why I'm not happy. Nuts. He knows? I'm just tired of this job. I get 10 e-mails a day where one of our processes has changed. Today, I'll get 10 more changing the ones from yesterday. I'm having a difficult time keeping up. I'm tired of every print job becoming a "learning opportunity." I got a call from the press supervisor Sunday night at 11:30.
"Uh, Holly, this Tylenol job we have running...the fold isn't lining up correctly."
"Uh, What do you mean?"
"Uh, the fold is right but the artwork is zigzagging."
"Uh, okay."
"Uh, what do you want us to do."
"Uh, I have no idea. I'll call you back."
So, I called my supervisor who wasn't about to come in and check the piece even though he lives closer and then I called the project leader who lives in Howell. By 12:30 in the morning, I was driving into work. She drove in as well. I wanted to shut the press down, she didn't. So, we didn't. All hell broke loose on Monday. Because I'm a frontliner, the blame usually falls my way. It should have been caught before it went to press. Yay. Yet another learning opportunity.

Yesterday, I was bypassed to go to our facility in Calexico, CA. This is a trip our supervisor has been promising to myself and two others who work on sampling programs. Guess who's going and who's not? Yes, I already told you.

I'm sorry. I'm venting. And really, when reading this, please don't hear my whiney voice. My voice is sad and distressed, trying to seek comfort in God, smile through all of this crap. Oh, and there is so much more crap then what I have let on here. Work crap. Family crap. Crap, crap, crap. There are still so many things to smile about. One of them is my roommate.

Last night, I came home and Krissie was making dinner. I asked what she was cooking up and her reply was, "all of your favorite comfort foods: homemade mashed potatoes, asparagus with mushrooms, and vanilla pudding with fresh blueberries." I stood in the kitchen in total amazement. Wow. "Awww, Krissie, that is so awesome of you," I managed to say without a crying fit. "Question: why vanilla pudding with fresh blueberries? I mean, I like it but I didn't know it was my favorite comfort food." "Well, you were just telling me the other day how much you like the parfaits from McDonalds but lately the fruit has been frozen when you get them." "Will you marry me?" I heard myself ask.

She is an awesome friend and the best person I've ever lived with. She really is. I will miss her when I suddenly quit my job, move in with my parents and try to get a job in a crepe shop somewhere....